"Umm, you don't sleep in the basement. You sleep down stairs. We don't have a basement."

At least your skids have a room and a bed to sleep in. When he is at the SpermIdiot's my son (SS) sleeps on the floor while the GF of the months get beds. This has been going on since SS was 2yo and through a half a dozen or more live in GFs.

Best regards.

I would have employed evil laughter and the explanation "because the monster gets the upstairs bedroom!" }:)

went through the same thing, ss was complaining that his bedroom was smaller than bio kids and we even measured the rooms with him there and he still continued to tell bm lies. and of course he was getting all sorts of attention from bm and grandp's about this.

I feel your confusion! BM told my fiance's boys that he and I are "mean" because they sleep on the first floor, in what we've made into the nicest bedroom in the house. The house is small, and very very live- we sleep with our door open, and we hear any peep they make, up the stairs. We leave lights on for them. Also, when he and I get married and they move in, we are going to replace my son's bed with their bunk bed so that they can sleep in different "configurations". So.....mean? I don't think so....but her words stick, and they are terrified by her constant commentary. Yuck! When will she stop? Why does she do this?

my SD8's bm tried to tell her that we will make her sleep in a 100 degree bedroom on the second floor in the summer because we are mean and cheap. UM WTF is that. she has the best air conditioner in the freggin house! SD was upset to come over the first night we had a hot one because of it. thankfully it was quickly resolved as it was obvious it wasnt the case... pretty stupid allegation since her own D caught her in the BS that she spews... only the beginning of it though.

All of these are EXCELLENT points!! I am continually surprised by the awareness and open minds that I read in this forum so far!! I am honored to spend my time here reading some thoughts of GREAT people in the world!!

I have been thinking about this one, and it is tough!! I agree with all the other ways to take this conversation. Figure out why they are calling it basement, find out if it is an age thing, redefine the "basement" for them, or make a fun joke about it! But underlying all these methods is trying to find the "why". Why are they asking or bringing it up?? That is the question we have to find out!!

I personally believe that it is something that is unsettling within their little hearts, and so they bring it up!! What a wonderful opportunity for you to correct an uneasy feeling within them No matter what they have been told, they found the courage to ask you about it!! How awesome is that!! Now you have the opportunity to respond within a safe environment and straighten whatever uneasy feeling they have inside!

I encourage you to do this as often as possible. If you respond with a defensive response, they will learn to connect uneasy feeling - "cause" - with defensive response - "effect". So control your "effect" and make sure it is a safe environment for that uneasy feeling to be explored openly in your house!!

Continuing to practice this will allow the children to continue to at least ask these off the wall, perhaps manipulated questions!!

SO, WAY TO GO!!!! Please let me know if I am completely off the wall here I tried to accurately articulate what my thoughts were.

Any way to be the victim, is how I see this! It sounds like a bitter BM spewing hate, again-! She is just jealous and do not be swayed by this - it is ridiculous.

It does not matter if they claim to not 'understand', this is just a complete manipulation to get 'more' out of you - time, attention, money, funny reactions, children leading the family, etc.

Explain it one time then repeat as necessary, they are just trying to rattle you.! HUGS

I would have handled it similar to Shaman...I would have used my evil laugh and said "because I'm the evil stepmonster and that's what we do!".

I use a lot of humor when dealing with kids/stepkids.

In the insurance industry a basement is defined as a sub grade space or room with no ground level access or egress.

If your house is a split level, downstairs is not a basement.

You could always take them to the local park with a well and tell them that BM is going to make them sleep in the bottom of the deep dark hole! }:)

That should tone down the basement debate in your home.

JJOC.

Best regards.