Background: DH is a complete non-parent and avoids his FOO. For over a decade, I facilitated all those relationships for him, including being a custodial SM to emotionally damaged teen YSD. I was his human shield, the bad guy then, and still am for disengaging.

We have had no relationship with McCrazy YSD30+ for many years (since she "ran away" at 19, 3 days before Christmas). DH's choice. She's made zero effort to reunify or take any ownership for her behavior, continued to lie and scapegoat us, and has shown not one iota of concern for her father...

Until this past year, when she texted Daaaaaddy. Bubbling with girlish glee, announcing her engagement and asking him to walk her down the aisle. Again, I'm disengaged, so it was several months before he even mentioned the request. He had sent a long, sincere reply, reminding her of all the unresolved yuk still between them and that it would need to be addressed before moving forward with their relationship. Crickets...

Until a few months later, when she sent him another happy text announcing her engagement and requesting he walk her down the aisle. No reference to her previous text, but she's a loon and no concern of mine.

I'm guessing the inlaws have been pot stirring, because tonight DH got a text from YSD. She sent a picture of her youngest child and a very passive aggressive message trying to guilt him for having no relationship with them. DH says family has told him that YSD is ticked and is hitting up other male relatives to perform this sacred role **cough cough** read: spend money on a tuxedo, travel and lodging for someone they aren't close to **cough cough**.

As Roseanne Roseannadanna used to say, It's alwaaays sompthin'. I've worked HARD on releasing attachment, accepting what is, and being disengaged these past several years. That's why I can finish this blog, finish this glass of wine and go for a swim. Not my crazy monkey in a veil, not my wedding circus.