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Elena's picture

I am so glad that I happened upon this site. I have been searching at times for something that fits into my situation - adult step daughter.

Last year was the year from hell for me. Sd moved in with her two kids, and she will never win the title of "mother of the year" nor "daughter of the year." "The Drama Drunk Queen" is her title.

I will just say here that she wants her Daddy all to herself while she lays on her ass getting drunk and doing nothing productive. Ain't happening!

Anyway more later with my story.

Comments

disgusted's picture

Get with hubby and make house hold rules and expectations of her stay.. Sit down with her and get out a calendar and say...We are are willing to help you but you have to help yourself.

Give her a specific amount of time that she can stay in your home..For instance if she moved in on Jan 1st..Give her until June 1st. After that date she either has to have enough money saved up to get her own place or move somewhere else.

Other rules also apply. For instance, if she moved in on Jan 1st she has to have a 30 plus hour a week job by Feb 1st. If she fails to meet that she is out!

She should also be expected to pay rent, utilities, and food while she is at your house. Even a small amount to enable her to save for her own place. The point is that adults and parents do not get a free ride..

Absolutley no drug usage or drinking while she is under your roof. If she does she is out immediatly.

In a perfect world their would be retroactive abortion capabilities. ~ disgusted

Most Evil's picture

You are among friends here Smile

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

Elena's picture

She moved in in January 08 and got kicked out by DH in May 08.

But DDDDaaaaaaaDDDDDDyyyyy pays her rent and other bills while she partys harded!

KittyKat's picture

When I met my H five years ago, my three were in their 20's and HATED that "daddy" had another "girl" in his life. Even tho none of them moved in with us, they were bugging him on the phone enuf that they might as well have moved in...

THANK GOD, thru disengaging (I tried being their "friend", etc.) and just MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS (in essence, NOT giving them any more of my energy to feed off!), they have completely backed off and have actually been cordial of late. (They're pushing 30 now, so one would HOPE they'd gorw up at some point..)

This site saved my life, and I'm not kidding. I really thought I was the worst person in the world (mainly for the BAD THOUGHTS I had about them...), but now I have another outlet (this site), so I don't need to even CONFRONT them anymore. Not worth it....

Welcome, and vent away!! Smile

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt

Tara12's picture

Well at least she is out of your house!!! Daddy is going to have to let her stand on her own two feet one of these days though.

Elena's picture

I wrote DH an email yesterday asking if he would go to marriage couseling. He didn't mention it when I got home from work. Today I didn't work, so this morning I asked him about the email. He said he didn't know we had any problems in our marriage. I told him we didn't right now, but unless we get some couseling now there were going to be problems. Did he ever get so sweet and affectional to me then. Still he won't see a problem. I did tell him my way was for me to talk to the couselor first then him, and then let the couselor decided how to continue. I will push for an appointment.