I was going to right this last night but everything was a mess.
The oldest child AGAIN came to me asking about spending equal time with her parents. Not just that but she laid out how she could do it. Starting with her spending 3 days a week with us and then 4 days with her mom. Then she said the next week they could be with us 4 days and their mom 3. My partner and I have never spoken in that great of detail around the children. It is very likely they’ve heard us talk about wanting more time with them but never have we laid out exactly how. I ended up texting him chewing him out and letting him know it’s his fault we aren’t there because of his failing to complete the VA. It angers me because the only thing I get back is “ok”. No, it’s not ok. His daughter wants to be with him more and it’s his own damn fault she can’t.
Then BM really angered me. The short story is she can’t accept a compliment about her son. She is so blinded by how her poor parenting is turning him into a monster when he’s with her that people telling her he’s actually a good child just goes right over her head to the point she was arguing about it. Seriously????? What hope does this kid have if his own mother can’t see the good in him? It made me really mad. I got to hear just what she thought of her own child and she couldn’t even say one nice thing about him. The kid has issues now and then but really it’s all parenting.
So yes I’m pissed at both of the kids parents and as I told my SO there’s absolutely nothing I can do about this.