My DH was in a relationship before he ended up with me. I in no way caused his marriage break up. When we first got together all of us used to get on well enough. Sometimes it was even fun! DH and I got married at a registry office with just 2 witnesses. I was pregnant at the time and we were in love and thought we were going to get our happy ever after. How wrong was I. I would like to add that at the time it was the only way we could afford to get married, 4 kids between us with another one on the way. DH still had to pay maintenance and keep his daughter in the lifestyle she had become accustomed to (expensive one time use dresses at a few hundred pounds a time, which he doesn’t pay for anymore to my knowledge). So just after we got married all hell broke loose with stepkids refusing to speak to him. My kids were fine about it. So he was so upset we had to cancel the honeymoon, and I felt disappointed for many years actually because I had never been married before ( he had, and therefore he had had a honeymoon before). So obviously I wasn’t happy. We waited for the dust to settle and all was ok again with skids. We then had our first bio daughter together, and made sure Step son saw her in hopsital on the day of the birth, and stepdaughter was at university.  So after this it fell apart again because DH was working full stop to pay the bills, we were barely managing, and DH had gone from seeing his grown up kids from about three times a week ( when it suited them) to a few times a month. It went on like this for a year. It got so bad at one point we even had a rent arrears letter.... which said we would be evicted if we didn’t pay it. About a month later I found out DH had bough a watch for a few hundreds for his daughters birthday around this time. All the time I couldn’t afford a haircut, all my kids had been going without. So I asked him to leave and he ended up going to his mothers. So after a few arguements, DH came back, we tried again. Then the “ we aren’t speaking to you if you are with her” started up again, which happens every few months now when they don’t like something. Sister in law waded in and said to everyone that I was stopping him seeing everybody. Which is not true, my DH is a workaholic. So then none of his family like me, they make snide remarks behind my back. Which I can ignore. But what I can’t ignore is my husbands approach to his kids when they ignore him, because he will sulk when they ignore him. He Denys this but he does. It doesn’t last for days or weeks I can last months all the whilst he’s pandering to them texting and running around after them trying to get them to take his calls etc. They can’t make definite arrangements with him, for example he has been reluctant to say I can only do ‘x’ evening a week for a few months. There’s a bit more to this, but it has ended up with me strongly disliking my DHs children, because he takes it out on the wrong person ( me not them. I have struggled on after attempting counselling but I think I have had enough now. I’m going to have to struggle for a while while I find my feet.  But