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Now Who's the Martyr?

devilwoman's picture

So, we were hit by the "storm of the century" Friday. Saturday morning, DH decides that he needs to go clear all 25" of snow RIGHT NOW. I took the opportunity to lounge on the sofa and watch. Too bad I didn't have potato chips (even at 7:30am).

He gets a good bit of the stuff cleared, and then by Sunday, he's huffy because the house is messy. Well, he hasn't lifted a finger since God-knows-when, and I've done nothing but the bare basics since our last episode two weeks ago. He stomps around, bitching and moaning, calling me an asshole, an idiot, and a pig. Soooooo....I work full-time+, but I should also be a full-time housekeeper? LOL! When the shoe is on the other foot, it's not quite the same.

Also, there are rolling power outages. The Spawn of Satan and their mother-SATAN - have no power. SS20 calls DH and asks for the generator. Of course he can have it...come right on over! Now, we still could lose power, but it's WAY more important that the EX have heat. I can go without. And this is the same lovely young man who threatened to KILL me, but hey, no problem. Luckily we didn't lose power...yet. There is another storm coming tomorrow.

Ugh. I'm SO sick of this.


Denial's picture

"He stomps around, bitching and moaning, calling me an asshole, an idiot, and a pig" You haven't decked him yet?

Can I ask, why do you stay? No one deserves to be treated like that (except maybe my DH's Ex, and probably yours, too).

Denial's picture

I am sorry you are going through this. Don't let what he says about you get to you - it sounds like he's lashing out because of some of his own issues!

devilwoman's picture

Thanks. It's true; he DOES have issues. I'm sick of them. It seems like every time he communicates with one of his kids, I get crapped on. They demand....GIMME DADDY, GIMME DADDY...and he does. I ask for help, and get told to suck it up and handle it myself. BUT, when he wants help, I'm supposed to jump. I cook breakfast (at 5am, mind you), pack his lunch, and come home after working 9+ hours to make dinner, clean up anything I didn't get to at 5am, and everything else that needs done. He, on the other hand, sits on the sofa and surfs the 'net on the phone THAT I PAY FOR. Did I mention that I pay RENT?????? Percentage-wise, I contribute WAY more of my hard-earned dollars than he does. But, I don't give him enough, according to him.

I'm absolutely fed up. I AM apartment-hunting today.

Denial's picture

Sounds like my EX husband. Same thing - I paid for most of the bills, did all the cooking/cleaning - you name it. While he sat on his a$$ and lived the good life.

And then if things weren't the way he wanted - it was my fault, I was an idiot, I was this, that, and the other thing. I think that's why your post stopped me in my tracks - sounded way too familiar.

I sent his lazy a$$ packing over 7 years ago - keep in mind he is now 39 years old - he still lives at his mom's house with her new husband. That's where he went right after the divorce - that's where he's stayed. Who's the idiot now? Men like this pi$$ me off!!!!