I've been trying to patch this mess back together for a long while...I don't know why. I guess I do still love him. But it's truly not working, as he is unwilling to participate. I'm supposed to make it all better, while he sits on his ass and plays with his phone.

I've asked him to go to counselling; he refuses. I've tried to talk; I get screamed at. It sucks.

BS20 is home from college...maybe permanently. He screwed up college pretty thoroughly (long story). I'm not particularly thriled. DH is FURIOUS. Now, he is not involved in any way in BS20s life, except to tolerate him in our home for the summer. My EX is the student loan cosigner, not me. BS20 would be home for the summer anyway. Yet, he is intentionally rude and mean to him, and flatly refuses to be nice to him. He nags him to get a job...he's been out job-hunting every day that he's been home, but that's not good enough. He doesn't want him to LOOK for a job, he wants him to GET a job. Nothing short of that is acceptable. He compares SS21 to BS20. Well, SS21 was given a job every summer that he was legally able to work by, of course, DH. He was a laborer, which DH arranged. SS21 went off to college, and of course quit. DH immediately got him into the union, and viola! He had a job! But he's unwilling to help BS20 in any way.

SD from Hell went to college, screwed up, came home, went to local university, screwed THAT up, and finally ended up in nursing school. DH footed the bill for all of this, with no complaints.

SS20 went to college this past year, and did fairly well. He needed some more credits (summer class), which DH is paying for.

So, HIS kids get the benefit of a doubt, but mine don't. I'm not asking him to pay any tuition, to get BS20 a job, nothing. BS20 is trying to help around the house, trying to stay out of the way, basically. It HAS to be so very uncomfortable for my son. Yet, DH is furious. With BS. With me. With the whole situation.

I've been asked to leave (screamed at to "get the f*** out). And, it's not the first time that I've been told to leave. So, that's the plan. I think I found a place, although it'll be hard to make ends meet. DH will also have quite the hard time making the bills, but oh well, this is his choice.

Now to divide the "stuff". He seems to think that everything I brought into this marriage (pretty much everything but the house itself)should be his, the house should be his, EVERYTHING should be his. Not so much. I guess this is going to be ugly. Like I need this again. Ugh. I'm exhausted.