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The spectre of adult SD and her exaggerations (lies) returns

DEDT's picture

Just having a wee vent. Oh okay a HUGE vent then. Since disengaging earlier this year I've done pretty well mostly, but last night DH told me that his daughter had telephoned to say she'd had an abnormal smear test. So guess who's racing over to visit her and her mum (his ex) tonight to discuss and console because she's so upset about it! He couldn't visit her last night because she was going out (hmmm shows just how upset she was huh?). I know I sound incredibly unsympathetic BUT five days before our wedding four years ago (which she wasn't even going to attend up until two weeks prior, then we spent heaps of $$$$ outfitting her and her boyfriend, then she sulked through all the wedding photos she was in and we couldn't use them) - deep breath - where was I? Oh yes, five days before our wedding she telephoned to say she had cancer of the uterus. We were so shocked and upset, but it turned out to be a huge lie and all that had happened was that she had had an abnormal smear (which was subsequently resolved, no drama). So yesterday's call about an abnormal smear test just made me think "ho hum here we go again". But it's stirred up all the angst and I'm feeling ropeable (in between wanting to cry my heart out). This is so not how I imagined life with my DH would be. And had I known........???

Time to review the replies from my first blog entry I think. Thanks heaps for listening, ladies. It really helps.

Comments

oneoffour's picture

Why is a girl her age calling Daddy and telling him she has ANOTHER abnormal smear test? Ewww!

I would tell my DH "Well, maybe it is a lifestyle problem. After all, this is the 2nd time in 4 yrs"

instantfamily's picture

I'm so sorry! Our first Anniversary is on Monday and while I'm looking forward to spending the day (we took off work) together, it's a bittersweet day for us because DH's family RUINED our wedding. I can relate to feeling bad about the pictures. Our big weekend wedding my parents shelled out tons of money for was then ruined by his siblings. The skids were wrangled by his parents and my family/friends so I barely had to see them, but who'd have thought the adult children would be the problem? I'm sorry your SD was such a downer on your big day! And yes, I think that you should mention why people usually get abnormal paps. How old is this pain in your butt?

DEDT's picture

lol This "pain in my butt" is nearly 26! Have loved the various comments to my blog two days ago - they have been VERY helpful - and funny too! My sense of humour sure is a lifesaver. Yes, I'll definitely mention to DH why women usually get abnormal paps hehe

Meanwhile I'm so sorry about what happened at your wedding - I still can't get my head around people being so MEAN. What is it with some folk??? So please you just go off with your DH on Monday and enjoy your special anniversary day to the max - think about and remember all the good times. Go celebrate!

instantfamily's picture

Aw, thanks. We'll try to dig up something to do that'll be nice for us. Skids are off to BM's so it's already a HUGE relief! A 26 year old pain the the butt is pretty obnoxious and I would NEVER discuss my papsmear with my father!!! That's messed up!

Yeah, DH married a large piece of white trash back when he was very vulnerable and depressed. 2 kids and 10 years later, he was divorced and had pissed off everyone in his family. I think his whole family was just gunshy I'd be 1st wife-like and they made a lot of misinterpretations about who I was and were apparently badmouthing me from 3 states away to everyone in their family while being super nice to my face. It unfortunately came out on our day. Oh well, it's the relationship that counts!
Hope your 26 year old skid and DH pull their heads out of each other's asses and you get a break Dirol

DEDT's picture

Hi there, hope your anniversary was lovely! Havent been on here since my last post. SD had followup biopsy today and as DH couldnt go with her his son did instead...along with her boyfriend! Cant quite get my head around a brother attending let alone a dad PLUS boyfriend. Sigh. Anyway how was your anmiversary? Have hoped for the very best for you.