Karma is biting her in the butt
BM's daughter (I will call her Sue) (not Dh's child even though she calls DH Dad) she has a 6 year old boy from a previous relationship. For the first 5 years of his life the child rarely got to see his dad because Sue was just being a b!tch about visitation. The court order at that time said that visitation was "agreed upon by both parents" and of course, she would always tell him, no. If she had plans and needed a babysitter, she would agree. If he wanted the child for a grandparents birthday party or father's day...the answer was usually NO. It didn't matter what was happening in BD's life, she wasn't going to agree on visitation.
At the end of last year, she decided to take BD to court to she wanted to remove his visitation because he was such a horrible father (her words). He wasn't a horrible father, he just dumped her after this baby was born and moved on with his life (very wise man). He went on to pursue his military career and to marry someone else. She was left raising the baby. She had every opportunity to pursue her military career. BM offered to keep the baby for the 8 weeks of training, she refused. She was able to get a grant for college. She failed the first semester because she wasn't going to her classes. She wasn't eligible for the grant after failing her classes. Of couse, because she couldn't do any of this it was BD's fault. He left her and it just wasn't fair.
Well, as everyone guessed the judge didn't honor her request to remove visitation but gave BD A LOT of visitation. BD gets the child every other weekend during school and the entire summer and Sue gets visitation one weekend a month during the summer. I think they alternate Thanksgiving and Christmas too.
BD has been very wise and is sticking to the court ordered visitation. Karma has come to bite Sue in the butt. She threw a tantrum fit when BD's vistation fell on the same weekend that she ALWAYS has the child's birthday party. He refused to give up his vistation. She whined about it to everyone. How dare the evil BD not give into her request? She was after all the MOTHER and she was in control. WRONG!!!!
Sue had a friend pass away over the weekend. This friend would babysit her son after school and they would hang out together some. Sue and the child lived with her for a year or so after BM kicked her out of the house. She calls BD and demands that he give up his visitation so the child can go to this friends memorial and she can tell the child in person that this friend passed away. BD lives in the next state over and is a few hours drive away. BD is sticking to the court order. He told her that she can tell the son on her visitation weekend or she can face time him. He basically told her Sorry, but it is MY time with him now. I am sure there are people that think the BD should have made this exception but if he made this exception her craziness would only get worse. BD has already had to file a show cause because she refused visitation after it was court ordered. The judge told her that she didn't have control anymore over the visitation and he would put her in jail if she disrupted Bd's visitation again.
Sue is saying that the child is crying and wants to come home but BD is being such a jerk. She has contacted her lawyer and she is going to punish BD for this. What can the lawyer do? What can the judge do? It was BD's court ordered visitation. She did this to herself when she took BD to court to have his visitation removed. She doesn't see that it is her own fault. She could have been generous with visitation in the beginning and I am almost certain that BD would be generous now.
She constantly tells people that BD doesn't show up for his visitation (not true). She has her crazy followers that just think the judge is going to punish BD because he didn't give up his court ordered visitation because Sue demanded him to do so.
Why do BM's like this exist? Sue insists that her son call her new husband DAD. I grew up with a step dad. My father died when I was very young, I barely remember him but my mom didn't insist that I call him dad. I called him by his first name. Sue is trying her best to PAS this child against his dad. I am almost certain the reason the child was crying and wanting to come home was because of what she was saying to him.
- Daisymazy2's blog
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This is exactly the Bm we're
This is exactly the Bm we're dealing with except bm and DH started off with 50/50 when SS was 8months old to almost 2years until BM realized DH wasn't leaving the door open for her to come back when she got done whoring around and proving to him what he was missing without her. Then it was "I'm MOM, do as I say or you don't see him". I've always been the 'either sh!t or get off the toilet' kind of person so after her bajillionth 'I'll see you in court' I told DH he need to take her to court or I was out. He did. He won primary when she only wanted him to have EOWE + CS. Even after the judge told her No, she said they would do 50/50 then but the judge told her no because that's what they had before and she testified it wasn't working. To this day she still tells people all this is DH's fault. He stole her son from her. Blah blah blah. She tried taking him back recently for 50/50 again and the judge denied her again. It was quit the show and one she's still showing her ass-oops I mean victim card all around. The crazy never stops.
I am so happy for BD in this
I am so happy for BD in this situation! Under normal circumstances sure, a swap of weekends would be something that they could come to quick terms with. However, anyone on this site knows you can't negotiate with terrorists! He did the right thing going by the CO and really, this is a young child, do they really need to go to a funeral? Unless it is a direct and close family member children really don't have a place at funerals, IMHO- of course.
Glad some non-BM centric courts exist!!
Usually BD gets the short end of the stick and is ordered to open his wallet. The Girhippo Clan aka Cabal go around saying that Chef is a deadbeat dad, doesn't pay CS, is a horrible person blah blah to everyone that will listen. Skids are totally PASed out. When Chef hired his "brother in law" to do some work around the house, the "BIL" immediately said "Everyone said you were mean and nasty" Everyone meaning the Gir Clan. Sadly most of Chef's family associates regularly with the Girhippo clan as it is a small town of 5,000. And most take the Gir's side if not outright, covertly.
Sue has tried
to get more child support. She complains that her husband has two children from a previous relationship and they have an "our" child together. She wants BD to pay more to help her out. The judge told her that wasn't BD's problem. He was only going to pay for the 1 child and he wasn't changing the order. It has been said that Sue's head started spinning like the exorcist.
Sue is BM on steroids. I really do fell sorry for the BD. He has to deal with her craziness for another 13 years. Of course, I have predicted that BD will eventually get custody. I have predicted that the new marriage will only last a little bit longer and Sue will go off the deep end and lose custody of both of her kids.
Thanks for the uplifting bio-dad story!!!!!
Sue is the apple that doesnt fall far from the BM tree.