You are here


daisy0202's picture

Hello everyone....Its been a little bit so wanted to update everyone....

Lets see for new people....My DH and SD16 no longer live with me. DH and I are still together but not living together....

This is still the case with some small changes....DH stays over every Wed. by himself, SD16 stays at the grandmothers (where they both live) Fridays to Sundays they both sleep over leaving on sundays...

SD16 is driving alot more (had a car and was afraid to drive) she drives all over now. Goes out with friends, not all the time but at least 1 day during the weekend. Some weekends she even sleeps at friends which is great....Her and I had a heart to heart about a month ago and that seemed to go over very well...We talked, we laughed and yes we even cried...

My DH and I have come to the conclusion that until she is in college we will continue doing things just as we are. SD16 has told me she is now thinking about going away to college where before it was a NO WAY GOING AWAY!!!! Now she is at least thinking aboout it.

DH has become more of a parent since she has been going out more. Actually telling her instead of asking her. It has been nice. There is still a long road ahead of us and still issues to be resolved but overall things are alot better....

I do have to say getting 2 families together who are from totally 2 different backgrounds and brought up so different is the hardest thing i ever had to do. These baby steps drive me crazy and sometimes is very sad that we are together but yet need to live apart to make our family. We have been going to therapy and that has been helping alot also. I do have to say though there is less fighting, less tears, and less agravation since we have decided to do this. DH was not happy when I asked them to leave but knows now this was for the best if our relationship was going to work...I finally see the light at the end of this horrible tunel!!!


napamom's picture

Thanks for the update! I was wondering how things were going! I always keep your solution in the back of my mind if we get to the point of something drastic having to change. Do you think your SD having some sort of a life outside of your DH helps you? I really feel that this is my biggest problem SD13 never has anything to do other than follow my DH around.

napamom's picture

Good to hear! I'll keep my fingers crossed that she actually gets friends one of these days.

Hanny's picture

Good hearing from you, I too was wondering how things are going.
I'd like to answer napamom's ? It did for us, when my SO's daughter got a car and driving, it was a big relief, she could go out and come back by herself. We no longer had to plan our night around hers. We didn't see her nearly as much after graduation either, now she's gone off to college! Daisy - hope this happens for you, college away from home is truly a blessing.