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Today is 13 days since I left.

cpreston's picture

When my DD and I are just having our day to day moments, things are calm and normal.

I am seeing that DD is calmer, happier, more polite and considerate, more responsible… she’s more affectionate too

I don’t feel this pressure pushing down on me

I don’t have to be DD’s buffer to him anymore
I don’t have to worry that I’m not emptying the dishwasher the right way
I don’t have to have my feelings hurt when I talk about work and he gets annoyed (though whenever HE discussed HIS job it was SO important)
I’m not concerned if I laugh too hard at something that isn’t THAT funny… because I don’t have him making me feel stupid for doing so
I don’t have to fight with a 28 year old who won’t help out or pay rent and who and sets a bad example for my DD

I feel like crap when I talk to him, went and did that last night. I thought it was to work out bills, but the conversation went to how my DD is the root of all of “our” problems
I told him that’s not why and tried to explain and his response (once again) was ‘that’s crap’

Wow, what a way to sum up everything
How YOU feel matters
How I feel amounts to crap

No amount of counseling can fix that
He’s always right
I’m always wrong
That’s the way it’s always been
That’s the way it would always be if I stayed

I’m glad I’m gone


Shaman29's picture

I'm glad you got out of there too. I know this has been difficult but I feel you made the very best decision for you and your child.

He was mentally, emotionally and verbally abusive to both of you.

((((hugs to you and your DD))))

overworkedmom's picture

You are giving me so much hope. I am leaving my husband too. Trying to secure an apartment right now. Keep your head up and moving forward!

BSgoinon's picture

I am so proud of you. And I'd like to say "SHOVE IT" to whoever was that rude ass that said you would go back to him. Blum 3

3familiesIn1's picture

I am reminded constantly why I left my XH - its been 7 years that I have been gone and yet he still reminds me every chance he gets it seems WHY I left.

Its a good reminder but at the same thing disappointing that he never figured it out - and for me, he is the bioF of my girls - his genes are in them and sometimes that is a hard pill for me to swallow.

Good for you. Stay reminded. Your life will pick up and his will not - you are on the right path. Stay strong.

HadEnoughx5's picture

I'm so glad you left that situation. Sounds like he's willing to blame everything and everyone else for why his relationship failed with you. It's always easier to blame someone else instead of looking at yourself for the answers.

You and your daughter will be much happier. I wish you the best!

cpreston's picture

I just went thru and read through some of my blogs
if that's not an eye opener for me I don't know what is

I haven't been happy for a very long time

thinkthrice's picture

Sounds like a HUGE weight has been lifted off your shoulders (about the same amount of weight that ex-H weighed, tee hee) Good for you and your daughter! I'm always suspicious about people who will NEVER accept responsibility or blame for anything. That shows a deep seated psychological issue. Stay strong!

misSTEP's picture

As horrible as the situations were that you went through to get to this point, I am glad that it got bad enough for you to leave.

YOU are worth so much more and your DAUGHTER is worth so much more.

jojo68's picture

You go and your daughter will find a better life full of hapiness!

I actually work with a couple guys who treat me the way you describe your Ex. Sometimes they are fine but sometimes they treat me like I'm the stupidest person alive...when you said you didn't have to worry that you laughed too long at something it struck a cord. I laugh a lot and they make fun of me for it...or tell me straight up that I don't know what I'm talking about or that I'm making stuff up when I share a story. I work in a job mostly dominated by males so maybe they don't respect me because I'm a women...I dunno.