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Spring Break Inertia

Cover1W's picture

So DH has been all moody and unpredictable again. Making a mess everywhere. He didn't even cook dinner for two nights in a row - and NO I did NOT help, everyone just fixed what they wanted when they got hungry. Of course YSD16s stuff is also piliing up in the kitchen. She tends to wash / put away about 50% of the dishes she uses but the rest, if she thinks it's too much of a bother (I am certain of this) she just leaves in the sink. I touched NOTHING. By last night after DH cooked (think of every space used, a cook that doesn't clean up after he goes) AND the dishes pile up I stood there for a minute and said that I would help clean up some of the dinner stuff and empty the dishwasher (not the drying rack) but that was it. The rest was on him.  NOTE:  YSD had disappeared by this point and I'm disengaged so not going there.

Later I asked him what was going on with him now? Did something happen with BM/OSD?  Was his depression coming forward again? Because I couldn't read him and he's been withdrawn since the weekend and short with me for no reason.  After some pushing it was because "....it's spring break and we're not going anywhere." This after I suggested PRIOR to spring break that he just go somewhere with YSD, just freaking do it. Me, "Well you still can - just go and do something or stay somewhere." He then mumbles a non-respsonse, "....it's not (worth it?)...she woud be (not fun?)..."  So I dropped it.

So he's being a pouty non-parent and wallowing. Whatever. I'm glad I have to work at my worksite tomorrow/Friday to get away from DH's mood and YSD scurrying places now and then from her room.  He didn't seem exited to meet me for a drink / food after work on Friday so OK then, I'll go with one of my friends!

Comments

Merry's picture

Your disengagement is going well! My DH is rarely pouty these days, but when he is I do the same. "OK, DH, then I'll go meet a girlfriend for that drink." He's always surprised, and I remind him I'm not going down that rabbit hole with him. He can enjoy feeling sorry for himself by himself.

Shieldmaiden's picture

That sounds like it sucks. Sorry you have to deal with that. Sounds like you are doing a good job of disengaging though. My DH always gets real quiet and then tries to make out like I am the one who has issues. He will say "are you ok? You just seem different lately." Yeah, because I stopped doing your laundry, washing your dishes, making your breakfast, and cleaning up after your kids. LOL. So, he thinks he is going to draw me into an argument by trying to make me feel like I am being unreasonable or strange or moody. That is hella annoying too.  Stay strong, sister!

Exjuliemccoy's picture

"Huh? What? No DH, I'm feeling great, really having a good week. But thanks for checking in. Gotta run - I'm meeting the girls for margaritas." 

Bounce that poor poor me ball right back into his court.

CLove's picture

No plans for long weekend with me - just fishing for him which is fine, Im planning some hikes.

Cover1W's picture

Good for you. I'll be out for a drink with my friend, doing some farmstand stops on Saturday, and planting a bunch of new plants for the back of the garden and clean up the front!  Need to hire my yard guy for some maintenance and grass boarder installation....but may put that off until May.  I'm hoping for a decent weekend of little to no rain.