You are here

Our Electronic World

Cover1W's picture

So last night, DH told me someone used an old account of his, to get online access at an airport recently. He initially thought it was someone hacking his account but then remembered SD12 has a friend who recently traveled through there...he suspects SD12 (who used to use the account for access while commuting) gave this friend her password some time ago...and also explains why DH's bills were so high for a while. His reaction, "Well, at least I cancelled it entirely so no one can use it any more." Pause...nothing more. Me, "Um, do you think you may want to have a discussion with SD12 about how NOT to share passwords especially to PAID sites...?" This goes on a bit. Then DH says, "Well, no big deal." Me, "REALLY? It IS a big deal if she continues to do this!" DH, "Oh, I didn't mean it *that* way." me thinking, OMG. Then thinking, I need to check my Netflix account to which SD12 has access.

So I check Netflix this morning. It doesn't look like she's sharing it, and seems to only use it when she's at our home. BM has strict rules about online access (which I agree with). But SD12 has been watching non-stop shows for hours upon hours on end. Minimum time is about 3 hours on school days and 7-9 hours (!!) on weekends. When she says she's 'writing' or doing homework. Yeah, I never believed that anyway. So, since it's my account, I let DH know I changed the password (on all devices) and that if he wants to re-give her access he is NOT to tell her the password but type it in for her. DH does not currently have the password. We'll see what happens tomorrow when SD12 cannot binge watch...DH has warned her to knock it off before to no avial...well, meaning that he hasn't had the guts to do anything. I also told him to NOT blame me for this but explain her binge watching habits need to stop.

Now I am shopping for a new phone/plan. Very much needed since I haven't upgraded for four years and my phone is having problems. Talked with DH about my initial findings and need to do more comparison...then he adds, maybe we can go on a family plan and add SD12! Me, "I'm not going on a plan with SD12. Nuh-uh." The thing is, I get a discount via work. And if it's a family plan it has to be in MY name to get that discount. NOPE. So I told DH that I will do my research for my stuff and if he wants to research family plans to compare that would be great. I want to switch by end of January next year. I will not be financially responsible for any plan SD12 (or SD10 will be on eventually) gets put onto. I'll reimburse DH for my expense but that's as far as it goes.

Comments

SM12's picture

Good move...my DH had two of my SS's on his plan when I met him. His phone bill is insane because they have to have the latest and greatest phone (which they break within 6 months) AND they have zero rules on the amount of data they use. He FINALLY put a cap on their Data after I lost it over the increasing phone bill.
I could seriously buy a small home for the amount of money he pays out in cell charges each month.
Once you add them...you are pretty stuck for at least two years.

I personally feel BM should have one of them on her plan and DH keep one on his plan but even BM (who is a royal pain in the A$$) doesn't want them on her plan.
I may have to push for him to boot one of them off next time they need a new phone because they broke theirs. I shouldn't have to wait long....It seems to happen at least every 4 months.

Cover1W's picture

I think I could do this as well, but do I want to?
Has DH ever, ever really put limits on her phone/computer usage himself? Nope!
I'm not taking it over and listening to the future arguments about why I neeeeeeed it or why she didn't reeeeeeealllllllly mean for that to happen so extend the plan darling please.

}:)

Nope.

notsobad's picture

I had the skids on my plan until they were out of school, then they got their own plan.

I liked the control, I could and did put stops on their phones when they went over on data. We also have Iphones and so I was able to track them with find my phone. Not that I had to but it was nice to know that I could.

notsobad's picture

My BFFs son did this! They went away for the weekend and her BS(17 at the time) was supposed to be staying at Dads. BS lied and told Dad he was staying at a friends.
He went to BFFs, used the garage code and had a party. It wasn't too big but there was beer and pot and peeing off the deck. The neighbours told them to take it inside or they would call the cops.

When BFF and SO got home the neighbour told them what had happened. BS came home from Dads and was questioned, he lied and SO had had enough.
BS was told to pack his stuff and he was dropped off at Dads! My BFF was stunned, her head was spinning and she wasn't sure what had happened. SO said he wasn't having a liar living in his house and that was that, no talking about it, no punishment, just gone.

SO turned out to be a crazy narcissist and she left him. It's a long story but she was lucky to get away from him.

She felt like she failed her son that day, that it was a right of passage and she never should have let SO throw him out. I disagreed (and still do), I thought SO was right to send him to his Dads.

I love my BFF but she always wanted to be the fun Mom, the friend Mom and her exH was the disciplinarian. It has backfired on her big time as BS is a mess. He lives with friends and has had a series of crap jobs, that he regularly gets fired from for not showing up. He has lots of big plans but never implements any of them and it's always someone else's fault why he isn't farther ahead in life.
She has paid his car insurance, his phone bill and his rent on numerous occasions. She still makes excuses for him and thinks he's going back to school next year.
When I ask what if he doesn't she just shakes her head.

--figureditout--'s picture

For a while Adult SS let us use his Netflix and Hulu. We let him use our Amazon Prime. Then he said he couldn't afford the Netflix and Hulu, so we paid it. After he moved across country and kept sad sacking on FB that he hadn't eaten, but had all kinds of new video games and plushies, DH said we couldn't afford the Netflix and Hulu. It was a lie, but DH said he was sick of covering Adult SS. We got our own Netflix and DH changed the PW for Amazon.

I watched all of the seasons of Grey's Anatomy and wanted to watch the current season so I went to Hulu on our Roku. There was all of this anime shit on it. I asked our boys (11 & 14) if they wrte watching anime and they said no.

Turns out that we were still paying for Adult SS Hulu account. DH contacted customer service because Adult SS changed the password and refused to respond to DH. There were 30 freaking devices attached to the Hulu account we had been paying for. Customer service shut it all down....meven the ones that were actively watching.

Acratopotes's picture

}:) oh you know me, I'm the b!tch lol.....

you changed wife passwords, thus SD12 can not use it, I will not even say anything, if she asks I wills mile and say, Hon we decided you are not old enough to have the password, remember X account you had the password and handed to a friend... well we received a huge bill, and that's why we have passwords, so that friends and strangers can not use out stuff, but you handed it out... thus for punishment you can not have the wifi password yet, we will have to wait till you are older and more responsible, lets talk when you are 16...

I still would share with SD10 and make it clear to her if she gives it out she will be punished, even if it's to SD12...
cause only responsible people can get passwords and keys to a house.... Oh and if we see SD12 using her electronics then sorry we will take those away as well,... only responsible people can use electronics...

I will have so much fun with this }:)

EDIT to Add: No she can not have a cell phone on any plan, she's not responsible enough yet.... pay as you go lol nothing more, hell she will not even have a cell phone if she lived with me, too young

Cover1W's picture

Ah, Acra if I only had so much control.
Basically though it doesn't bother me much.
It's starting to bother DH though - again, that pesky disengagement works!

And the good thing is SD10 could give a flying fig about TV or phones.
She has a Kindle and that's it - no access to anything on there. She thinks SD12 is crazy to watch all those shows. DH is likely just going to get her a flip phone next summer since she'll be commuting more like SD12 is now, sometimes on her own.

SD12 actually could use a phone - there's been times when DH and/or BM needs to get her detailed info. I told DH that I don't want to be involved in the decision, period. But that he better make sure there's controls on that phone if she does get one.