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Ex wife creates a Clone!

cindy1968's picture

Ex wife creates a Clone!
You know we just call her kind Physco (not in front of the kids) but, when her children grow up and are not prepared for the real world she will be the one that has to deal with it!
I do not know what happened to the oldest step daughter I had when I got married but, it took one year and $4,000.00 in court and lawyer fees (which is a lot of cash to me) to realize she was just mad at her mother and step father, for telling her she was lazy and did not deserve a Christmas and for having a son (she now dotes on her step brother hand and foot because it pleases the mother). She told her father that she wanted to live at both places 50/50. I had the husband wait 3 months before filing the paper work with the courts, we sat her down and told her that things where going to change one way or another. For one her mother would be getting her some very assume gifts. Well, by the time we got to court we had 2 of the three local judges recuse themselves because they new the ex wife. So we at that time got a few changes in the old decree, like explaining to the ex wife that joint legal custody means you have to discuss things like school and medical with the father. But the children stay at her home as far as custody. Then tis our turn to piss off the oldest step child at 14 and a half we talk her in to being a cheerleader, or she has to tryout for volleyball so that she is not sitting on her butt watching TV everyday after school. The only things is she has to keep her grades up (she was a honor student) Then the grades fall and we tell her she cannot go to a basketball game because she is failing science (she was not cheering at this event) and it is our weekend. This pissed her off! After the 30 mile trip one-way we get there to pick up both of the girls and we see step daughter and mommy walking hand and hand through the school parking lot, going to the game. The youngest child was called at school and told to ride the bus to a friend’s house after school. The mother would bring her some clothes because dad said he was not picking her up if the oldest was not coming over (that was a lie also).
A month later there was a court date and visitation is changed (because Friend of the Court believes everything out of the mothers mouth) and the oldest step daughter has been over twice once to go through our computer and paperwork prior to the court hearing and the first visit after the visitation change to listen to every word that was spoken to the youngest step daughter and it was fathers day and she could not even say Happy fathers day to her father. Since then she has been a no call no show. My husband I contacted her about coming over for fahters day and told her to call if she wanted to come over anytime with or with out the little sister. Since we have not heard from her I am assuming shei waiting to see if will buy her off like her mother. I will be damned if I will kiss her ass and buy her off with new cell phones, digital cameras, DVD and mp3 payers. Like the mother did so she would stop being mad at her, and the step father.
The youngest is the one who gets to pay for all these changes, the mother told the case worker that she cries every time we pick her up because, she knows that we will not let her attend the High School Events. In all honesty she will sometimes cry when we pick her up from the front door to the truck and by the time we hit the end of the drive she is fine and not crying. Her mother will get her all worked up about her siblings missing her and her missing her and all the fun stuff she will miss when she is at her fathers, if that does not get her crying then the mother starts in “I wish you did not have to go there”,” I know you want to be here instead”, “we are going shopping this weekend and I will look for something for you” Mind you that every time she is at our house the oldest one who is 15 gets a new purse of shoes that always seems to cost in the area of $50 to $85 and the youngest who is at our house get nothing from the mother. When this first started happening the buying off of one over the other (before the visitation change back when she wanted to live with us) I told the youngest that I could not buy her all the things that her mother buys her sister but, we could however give her the attention she wants. She is a cuddle bug!
She will never know how to salmon fish (at least not with us we have taken her twice), my parents, or family as the courts changed her visitation so that as a 5th grader she can go to high school sporting events to watch her sister cheer (of course it is a sport sort of but, at her age she does not need to hang out at the high school every Friday night). Now she comes over on Saturday afternoon instead of Friday night and as much as I love her I am not asking my family to change plans so she can attend and if we are going fishing up north her mother can have her. It will give them more time for the sport that she is teaching them so well, shopping and yes they think it is a sport!
Thank you for letting me vent!

Comments

Allyceson's picture

My husband's daughter is also being raised to be a carbon copy of her materialistic mother. If you're not giving her something, she doesn't care if you even exist. She hasn't seen her father in 3 years (lovely BM refused visitation and my hubby's been waiting almost 2 yrs to get before a judge), but still can't be bothered to answer the almost daily emails he sends. She did for about the first week, then must have realized that she wasn't getting any money, gifts, etc out of it and since then has told him that she gets his emails, but doesn't write back because she doesn't like to type. Why would she? She gets way more given to her by other family members without putting in any effort. Sad The only good to come from it is that it's helped my hubby to see exactly what his kids are becoming and takes some of the pain away from not being able to see them because the truth is that she will continue to act this way whether he has visitation or not.

Allyceson's picture

Yes, they are still his kids. But he's not going to put himself into a situation where he's continually abused my them and their mother. He loves them unconditionally, but that doesn't give or anyone else the right to try to make his life miserable. It's not about controlling their behavior- it's about the right to expect respect from your kids. We don't allow our kids to disrepect us and the divorce of their parents doesn't give the Sks the right to do it, either.