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It's Been A Minute

CastleJJ's picture

All has been quiet on the BM/SS11.5 front. SS got his braces last month and DH has fulfilled the initial portion of the financial obligation for that. We will continue to pay our portion monthly for the next 18 months of treatment. You could tell BM was extra nervous about getting her money, despite that we have never not paid, because she sent several emails and the reimbursement form was riddled with notes from her.

SS11.5 arrives tomorrow for half of Christmas break. He will be with us for 8 days. We haven't seen him since the first week of July. BM has been radio silent, except for 3 emails she sent DH filled with useless information that is months out and really has nothing to do with us or SS. She usually gets "talkative" right before SS comes for a visit. 

We talked to SS last night and he is THRILLED about coming to visit. It's all he could talk about - how much he has missed us and DD, that he was looking forward to watching Christmas movies and baking cookies, that it's been too long. DH joked and said "So do you have any fun plans this weekend?" and SS giggled and said "I don't know Dad, do we?!" And they both broke down laughing. SS said he even bought DD2 a Christmas gift with his own money. It sounds like at BM's, he doesn't do much outside of school and sports. He said he watches a lot of TV and just sits there, that BM rarely engages with him. I am so happy that despite all of BM's attempts to PAS SS, he is still wanting to be a part of our lives and is genuine about it. Sometimes, you never know which SS you are going to get - the PASed, irritable, untrusting SS or the happy, loving SS. It all depends on how hard BM pushes the PAS right before a visit. I hope this version of SS is who arrives and we have a smooth visit. 

Happy Holidays, everyone! 


thinkthrice's picture

An uneventful Christmas!  The implication that you won't pay is laughable.  The Girhippo did the same thing to us. 

THREE MORE PAYMENTS  and the Girhippo is off the payroll after only 19 years and six months.

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

too on keeping him excited about his visits. I know SD loves us and loves to visit us, but SD is used to having her sister around a lot AND BM pawns the kids off on relatives and friends that have kids their age ALL the time. So sometimes SD is lonely not having someone to play with that is a kid too. I mean we have friends with some kids and she goes to camp in the summer etc., but we won't see those friends and there is no camp over this break.

I think SD will be really excited to have a sibling here. Over the summer she asked me would I rather just have her at our house or also other kids. I wasn't sure her motive for this question and since we have been unsuccessfully trying for quite a while for a baby, I told her we love having her. SD then said that it would be nice to have a sibling to play with her though. So I thnk that tells us that she will be excited when we tell her the news in a couple of months.

I hope you get the involved happy SS for Christmas though! It sounds like he is already excited and that BM cannot rain on his parade.

advice.only2's picture

I’m putting a Christmas crisis involving the braces and an absolute melt down from SS and BM on my Bingo card…sorry.

CastleJJ's picture

Lol we've already taken all necessary precautions on that front. We bought the orthodontic mouthwash the orthodontist recommended, the flossers, the wax, etc. We also printed off the "no foods list" the orthodontist provided and taped it to the inside of the pantry door. That way when SS says "oh my Mom said I can't eat any of this" we can rebuttle with "if it's not on the orthodontist's list, it's fine."

Now if he ends up with a broken bracket or a slipped wire, then there's going to be issues. Let's hope he can make it 8 days without breaking something.