Hi! I'm the stepmom and my husband and I pick up the kids from BM on Sundays at 8am.
I have picked up the kids alone before and BM has had other people pick up the kids from our place before. There is nothing in the CO that says no one else can pick up the kids besides Bio parents. Nor has either side expressed that they don't want anyone else picking up the kids besides themselves. It's all been very kosher and flexible with pickup and drop offs.
I'm the stepmom, my husband and his ex have 50/50 custody with two kiddos.
I am really unaware of all the "rights" or access I'm allowed to have as a stepparent.