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BM Breaks her Silence...

BSgoinon's picture

BM requested "mediation". I can't believe they actually granted her request since the judge has made it clear that nothing will change until she completes rehab, and SS is old enough to decide for himself what kind of relationship he wants with her. But we did receive notice of mediation, so we will go... waste of time, but we don't want to give any reason for a judge to think we aren't making every effort to do the right thing. Should be interesting. SS's thoughts on it... "what does she think she is going to get out of this?". He doesn't have to be there, in fact I scheduled for him to go up to BM's parents house that day/ evening so he would be occupied and not have to even think about it.

SS doesn't answer BM's calls. Mind you she has only called ONCE in the past month. He put her to VM and deleted it before he even listened to it. He doesn't respond to her texts. He told me he doesn't even want to see her name in his phone, he deletes them all.

After a failed attempt to talk to him, and a few unanswered texts yesterday, BM text DH. We haven't heard from her in a long time... and DH NEVER responds to her so I don't know what her goal is. Yesterday wasn't any different. She text him, he ignored.

"I don't understand why you are not letting me see SS"
"If you were a good dad you would make him talk to me, I am his mother"

Now, had she sent that to me, I would have had a hay day... I would have taken the opportunity to tell her that if she was ANY kind of a "mother" we wouldn't HAVE to MAKE him talk to you, he would want to, and he doesn't. So there's that.

"Mediation" should be interesting. I really think it was an oversight by the court system that she was even able to schedule it. We will not be mediating ANYTHING. Had a talk with SS to make sure his feelings hadn't changed and he still wasn't wanting to see her, he said "I don't even care about that at all, I do NOT want to see her". He's still pretty mad that she stopped rehab.

Comments

Maxwell09's picture

I can't believe it either. Is it a new judge or she filed something on her own? How is she doing this and with what money? I don't think y'all have anything to worry about but I would worry anyway because anything can happen. Have you thought about recording your SS saying he doesn't want to see her and having your attorney submit it to a judge? Or have the boy tell the judge in a private meeting in his chambers. I am against making the kid a part of a huge court ordeal but I really feel like everyone will keep doubting it's SS choosing this until they all head it from his mouth. To me, that should be enough to just let y'all off the hook dealing with that woman completely.

robin333's picture

I hope she gets a smack down from the judge for wasting his and your time. And for breathing.

ESMOD's picture

How old is SS? It sounds like he is mature enough to know what is going on. TBH, I really think it would be important for him to be able to present his thoughts into mediation. Can you contact the mediator and see if they can arrange to see him without either parent present (to avoid influence)?

BSgoinon's picture

All of this is true, except in Cali we don't pay for mediation. It's free. They WANT the parents to try to come to an agreement without going to a judge. In most cases it is a helpful tool. But not with us. It's a waste of time. But seriously, I had nothing better to do next Tuesday afternoon, this will be entertaining. **eyeroll**

ESMOD's picture

I have been involved with mediation (not CS related) and the mediator got input from both sides. Both sides made their case and then the mediator gives their decision.

There can be different rules on mediation. Sometimes the mediator is able to craft their own compromise.. sometimes all they can do is choose one or the other side's request. Binding mediation means both sides agree to abide by their decision.

If there is any component where the mediator will be making a call. The SS should have input.

BSgoinon's picture

4 days, she lasted 4 WHOLE days.

Then she ended up in the hospital and missed a week. She never went back after that.

BSgoinon's picture

Yeah, for her teeth. I am not really sure what the final outcome was. I do know she left the hospital against the doctors advice and went crazy on them on her way out. The hospital called her mom and let her know that they were concerned and would like her to come back. That didn't happen. She did post pictures of herself the day she left the hospital and she didn't look like herself AT ALL. Her entire jaw was swollen. It was really, very strange.

She did post a few weeks ago that she was having the "problem tooth" pulled. She's gotta have at least 4 teeth left by now.

Tuff Noogies's picture

lol reminds me of g-ma's words to dh about the state of her own daughter's oral health, "well (dh'sname), they're rotten!" as in 'whaddaya expect?'
Dirol

ps - not that you're gonna give suggestions to that waste of oxygen, but she could get a tooth pulled at the local health department.

RayRay's picture

"they don't die they just mutate"
I almost wet myself I laughed so hard. That's funny stuff, right there! Also, it answers why druggie BM is still alive. She's a cockroach.
Many Thanks!

mommadukes2015's picture

BARF. She's seriously a nutjob.

At least you'll be entertained for a little while. That poor mediator doesn't know what's coming.

--figureditout--'s picture

Maybe she went to the hospital with a purposely allowed bad tooth to get the good sh*t. I have an ex-friend who is a heroin addict. She slammed her own hand in the car door 6 times in the ER parking lot to get some Lortab. Now she has a warrant out for her shoplifting bullsh*t to pay for her drugs.

As for addiction....I am an alky. I went 4 months on my own. Then went 3 months. Third time is it for me. I have 7 days, but I want it this time. Next time I am voluntarily going to rehab.

BSgoin....does your SS journal or blog at all? I have been told that if the kid is able to express him or herself in writing by themself, it is looked on by the Judge as the child's wishes and they don't have to do the testifying.

BSgoinon's picture

Outtahere, SS is 13. BM is a meth addict and SS is very well aware of it. She has dug her own grave. I don't feel in the least bit bad for her AT ALL.