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SD's nastiness, random bs, and the great underwear saga continued

borrowedtime83's picture

So, as most parents probably do, we randomly check the girl's media devices. We have also installed a Net Nanny program on their tablets/computer. Sadly, we learned over the weekend that it does not work on the YouTube app, and SD11 has been repeatedly watching what I would classify as porno with the privates bleeped out with black squares. She is only 11, and I am pretty devastated, as it also came out that BD9 was watching with her. I felt a false sense of security, I guess, and we got played, and now both kids have been watching things that "inappropriate" for their age doesn't even come close to.

On another note, SD still has no underwear. I have bought her THREE multipacks (like 24 pairs or so)in the last 6 months. This should conservatively be enough to supply both our house and BM house with panties, yet SD comes home wearing no underwear, wearing what appears to be her 7 yr old sisters underwear, or, this past weekend, she came home wearing a one-piece bathing suit under her clothing. (No, she did not just go swimming that day.) But, when we gave one of her old dresses to BD9, she threw a hissy fit because "BM bought that dress for me!" Well, I hate to tell you dear SD, but BM has hundreds of things that I personally have bought for you at her house that I will never see again, so throwing a fit over a too-small dress that you wore home from BM only because it didn't fit you, is a bit ridiculous. I am sure we will be getting a screaming, raging phone call from the trailer park juggalette wannabe about this dress sometime soon also. I am about ready to show up on BM doorstep with a plastic target bag and tell her to fill it up with the underwear she stole, clean, dirty, whatever, I don't care, but I am not buying her anymore. I also told SO that I was done handling this, and he needed to take care if it, but of course he doesn't wanna anger the beast. I have pretty much stopped buying things for SD11, but the underwear thing REALLY bugs me for some reason (obviously).

Comments

Cover1W's picture

I get you. Been there, done that with Both SDs.
I gave up on the socks and underwear thing with SDs about a year ago.
DP doesn't care, BM doesn't care, SDs don't care.

I can't do it.

Done, done, done.

Don't worry about it any longer. Not your issue.
You'll get over it in a couple months. What you need to do now is NOT do any laundry for SD11, because for me, that'll bring it up again for you (why is there no underwear in the laundry basket?)...withdraw quickly and cleanly from this situation.

borrowedtime83's picture

Oh, we took them away all right. They are in a locked box in the attic. I just don't know how to wrap my head around the amount of damage they have possibly done to themselves watching that crap. I am so mad and angry, but also worried about their mental health.

Cover1W's picture

They'll be fine.
Hopefully you can talk with them about "healthy sexuality" vs. porn.

You are lucky your DH is on board with this!
Mine doesn't watch the electronic use at all, zero monitoring.
:O

borrowedtime83's picture

We did talk to them, and told them if they were curious about things, or wanted to know something, to ask a parent, and if we don't know WE can look it up for them. I know we are pretty old fashioned, and don't want our kids to believe that just because the rest of society condones certain things that doesn't mean those things are OK in our household. Trust me, this is a hard line to walk since BM lets SD watch Bones and other adult shows and encourages her to read Twilight and Hunger Games, which we think is too early for her yet. We understand that they will be curious about sex, and we don't want them to believe that it is a "shameful" thing, but we also don't want our little kids watching people having a 3-some only covered by black boxes.

HappilySelfish679's picture

I sent sd8 ( then Sd 5 ) back to BM in underwear made from paper towels and scotch tape since she kept all underwear I bought . I was still engaged then. Now I simply don't care and haven't done laundry for skids in years .

borrowedtime83's picture

SD gas already watched all said movies associated with the book series, and no I have not read the books, but we just would prefer she didn't read books from the teen area yet, especially since her maturity level if often below her age level.

I am ready to stop doing SD laundry period. She must like going commando at least a little bit - don't ask me how I know....EEW!

LuckyGirl's picture

Does your SO pay child support? Buy her what she needs and deduct it from the CS - send the BM receipts as proof. Problem solved.

borrowedtime83's picture

No, we have SD11 more than BM, so she doesn't get child support, and BM doesn't pay us anything either, so its a big free for all.