Yep I am stupid
Due to the drama of all that has gone off with SD2, and the stress that it causing the hubs, like an idiot I started engaging again, not directly but with a bit of advice when asked.
So, this hapened
About 10 mins before this a was joking about something our DD had done and we were laughing about it.
Our DD managed to get SD a job interview at the place her works. So I said “I hope she doesn’t let her down seeing it will be the first job she has every had [she is 37]”, and has openly said that her job is being a mother and will never work. This job is the sort of job that as long as you turn up to the interview and can say you name you will be offered it.
Well the hubs, true to form went on defence mode and said that I am always on her back and never give her a chance.
That is me back to being disengaged.