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Surprising gifts givers

autumn_raynes's picture

I was extremely surprised by SO's family this year. They (including his kids) gave me and my kids gifts for Christmas. To be fair, they don't celebrate Christmas in the traditional sense; they usually go on a group ski trip. They aren't even gift givers for Hanukkah. I am not saying this to be gift grabby or anything but it was nice of them. Last year, which was my first Christmas really knowing them, I got them gifts because I didn't realize they didn't do gifts. By the time SO told me I had already bought them so I just gave them. So maybe they were expecting gifts again and  wanted to be reciprocal? I don't know but I didn't get them anything this year. And SO says he did not know about the gifts. Interestingly enough they did not get SO anything though. 

The weird thing is I have taken a huge step back from my relationship with them. I have not gone to any of their holiday events. SO and I even spent Christmas with my family. And I have taken a step from his kids too. I have not seen his daughter specifically in probably 3 months. I suspect she has been making herself scarce as well. She barely participated in our Christmas FaceTime with his family. She actually left early. 

I really hope this is not a ganging up situation to show SO how nice they are because they were very upset that he did not go on the ski trip. And I was very candidate with SO that he could go if he wanted. He is going to celebrate the New Year's with them though. 

Comments

justmakingthebest's picture

They probably did get gifts because you did it last year, which is nice of them to do. Maybe next year you can discuss with them if you will be exchanging gifts or even suggest a White Elephant exchange for some fun? 

Sometimes taking a step back from family is really the only way to move forward. If they are extending an olive branch, maybe it is time to give them another shot? Worst case, they confirm that they are people you don't want to be around! 

autumn_raynes's picture

Maybe, but, they still invited BM to every family event. I don't anticipate that changing and it makes me uncomfortable.