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Required Reading for ALL Parents

Auteur's picture

And here it is. Parents need to teach their children these things. Sadly they aren't and especially not today's permissive parent when in the case of the "non intact" family.

http://www.drdaveanddee.com/manners1.html

Comments

Step Up's picture

Amen.

Auteur's picture

Yes! A poster told me it was idiotic to expect a child to greet an adult first when the child is the GUEST in the house and the adult lives there.

Obviously there are more etiquette rules than this but I'm sure some of these permissive parents (like the mother of that eight yr old who had to be pepper sprayed) would think these requirements "too harsh"

sweetthing's picture

Those are great. My BS who will be 4 in July has been taught these & has mastered all but 1. The waiting your turn to talk. If Dh is trying to tell me something he has to be told multiple times to be quiet that the adults are talking. He is fine unless it is me that is involved. He wants mommy's attention. Everytime I remain firm because this is an important lesson.

Auteur's picture

You should come over and teach that to GG.

Scenario: (GG and I are having a conversation after work; of course Prince Hygiene does not like this and needs to be the center of attention at all times)

PH: "Dad, DAD, DAD, DAD"
GG (stops talking to me immediately and addresses the interruption) "What honnnneeeey?"
PH: "Um, um um, um" (thinking of something to say to justify the interruption)
GG: "Yesss?" (waiting patiently for days on end)
PH: "One time, I saw a squirrel."
GG: "That's good honneeeeeey!" (pats PH on the head, essentially rewarding him for interrupting an adult conversation)

This actually happened. PH was almost 7 at the time. I'll bet the ranch that all three still interrupt and have never been taught to wait as they have all been non-parented on the "instant gratification" model.

sweetthing's picture

Trust me it drives both of us nuts. Raising a toddler I know why people just give in, it's easier. I work, have a long commute & suffer from pain daily, so I can be really wore out & exhausted by the time I get home. Then I have meals to cook & a son who just wants mommy, who I want to spend time with & enjoy. There are days that it would just be easier to let him do what he wants, but I don't.

Somewhere along the line we parents have forgotten how important our job is in raising our kids. It is about giving them all the tools they need to function & succeed in the world. Our children will only be successful if we raise them well.

I don't want my son being 40 & living in my basement playing video game, of course I will be 80 then & may not give a hoot.

Geema's picture

I would laugh, but it is all to familiar.

OK I still laughed with "thinking of something to say to justify interruption" because it is so true.

Only DH calls SS "baby" and "honey". BARF.

steptwins's picture

This (basic manners) does not apply to twin boys. DH says they are competitive since birth and not bad mannered... And now you know. LOL.

Auteur's picture

Competitive, eh? You too with the DH euphemisms??

Yeah it's hard to come home from a job and commute (or two jobs as some of us older single moms had to do before draconian CS laws went into effect) and teach your children how to behave.

Parenting is HAAAARD work. Anyone who says otherwise is doing it wrong.

Auteur's picture

"they still said please, thank you and waited their turn."

I find this to be such a RARITY these days that it actually causes you to stop and thank the parent!!

I can't tell you how many times Prince Hygiene would NEVER say please or thank you, grabbing stuff from register workers at the donut shoppe. Putting his greasy, booger laden, e-coli infested hands, nose and lips on the glass staring greedily at the donuts.

And the interruptions are atrocious!!

sweetthing's picture

It is also important work. Maybe because I am in my 40's with my 1 & only being almost 4, I take it more seriously than a younger parent might. I don't want my child to not be the best that he can be & be happy & respectful. Wanting them to have it all doesn't equal material things but having it all inside.