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Having SKid (sd) every holiday and long weekends rant!!!

Ashleytenorio17's picture

Like seriously DH and I have had SD for literally every holiday  ( BM bailed on Christmas again) and I mean the entire holiday break for Christmas and some how DH EOW weekend also falls on a weekend where Monday is a holiday so it's not a relaxing time at all, it's literally an extra day of being stressed! I know that can't be helped but it's like come!!!! I recently start working again, DH and I were discussing Valentine's Day and maybe getting a sitter for our little ones DD 6 months old and DS3 so we could finally do a date night. Valentine's Day also happens to fall on a long holiday ( Presidents' Day February 17th.) I was super excited becaise im off and so is DH so we were thinking doing a day trip somewhere and enjoying the day! Was checking the calendar and OF COURSE this falls on SD weekend with us!!! I wouldn't mind if she was ok to be around but if you read my blogs you know she is extra clinging, self absorbed and entitled! If we have her a long weekend she thinks that mean us catering to her and entertaining her constantly especially daddeee! Ugh is anyone else in this struggle! I was sooo looking forward to Valentine's Day and to get a break 

Comments

Siemprematahari's picture

I can sympathize with you. Can your H get a family member to stay with her while you both enjoy some much needed time alone? I'm sure BM staying with her may be a stretch but I can understanding wanting & needing that time together. A break will do you both some good from the every day routine. 

Ashleytenorio17's picture

Im he was thinking of maybe asking BM to switch that weekend with us but we never know how crazy is going to react. BM moved 3 hours away but SD lives with BM mother for now so I'm not even sure if it would affect BM mothers time. Well we were gonna go out of town that whole weekend since it's a 3 day weekend and now I'm not sure

Ashleytenorio17's picture

Yea I when she bailed on Christmas again this year I told him that's it!!!! We are only picking up SD10 on Christmas Day!!! It's crazy but this lady doesn't even live with SD so when it's "her time " SD is usually with BM mother 

ESMOD's picture

Why can't you get a sitter for all three.. you were already considering it for the other two?

Ashleytenorio17's picture

We were thinking of going out of town. That's why and the day off we have the small ones would be at the day care... so yea

HowBoutScottyDont's picture

Is your DH open to getting a sitter to watch all the kids, including your SD?

It sounds like BM is not reliable in any way. ASk her to keep SD or switch, but assume she will flake or bail, and have a sitter capable of handling all three, to include SD's less than stellar behavior.

Ashleytenorio17's picture

We don't have a sitter. We were actually thinking about asking their grandmother to watch them while we had dinner and movie then taking the littles ones with us if we went out of town because they are super good and chill , SD would complain and being clingy the whole time. Monday the daycare is still open so we were gonna drop kids off while me and DH had the day off and maybe just chill for a few hours . Kids like SD10 school is out that day. We may try to ask BM to switch weekends, SD stays with BM mother so I guess we ask her ?

Ashleytenorio17's picture

And I mean grandmother like my mother. We were gonna ask my mother to watch out little ones because we don't have a sitter ever. 

ESMOD's picture

If your DH has a decent relationship with his exwife's mother.. then I don't see why you see if she would be available if her mother couldn't do the switch.

Ashleytenorio17's picture

Yes he will ask but I know she will make things difficult, who knows though lol. Oh and she's just then baby momma lol they only dated for about 2 months, never married and she got pregnant after dating DH for 2 months I believe.

Thumper's picture

What would you do IF dh's kids were your own bio kids.

That question is not intended to hurt or upset you.

Can you find a sitter OR celebrate before OR after the Hallmark Holiday? OR go out to eat, rent a hotel room when dh's child is with MOM. Keep plans close to the vest, if you give any hints about your plans to anyone besides dh,  BM may do what she can to ruin them.

Not a fan of Hallmark Holidays---too much stress to attempt to meet expectations. Lots of pressure on men.

 

 

ESMOD's picture

and it's an excuse for everyone to mark up the cost of meals.. hotels.. flowers..candy..lol

Ashleytenorio17's picture

Well the thing is 2 are both our children DD 6 months and DS3 . My mom has agreed to watch them both for us and BS 8 will be with his father so that just leaves SD10. My mom is not obligated to watch SD10 and will have her hands full with our 2 so we will most likely ask BM is she wouldn't mind switching the weekends or just that one so we will have SD this weekend and the next weekend . IF she agrees.