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Communication Issues with BM

Anon2009's picture

Back when we had EOW visitation, and DH would try to communicate with BM about the skids' schooling, medical and psychological issues, she wouldn't communicate with him. She wouldn't give him any information. He ended up having to call the school, doctor, psychologist, etc.

I've been reading a lot on here recently about BMs not communicating such information with the BFs. My suggestion to this problem is to send copies of the court order to the school, doctor, etc. and go to them for information, if possible. In fact, I think that when it comes to dealing with exes who can't communicate, this should be written into the court order.

What do you think? Do you think BM's should be carrying this weight, or do you think it would just be easier for everyone for the schools and doctors to do things like send report cards and medical reports/bills to both houses? I always say that dealing with the nice secretary at the school or doctor's office is a lot less stressful than communicating with an uncivilized ex.

Comments

mamacat_30's picture

I don't think that schools mind at all. This past year DH and I went to SD14's school to initiate a more active role in her schooling and everyone was really supportive. They put him on the mailing list, signed him up for on-line stuff and let him talk with her school counselor. I'm not sure about doctors offices, but with everything being so electronic these days I'm sure it's not hard to duplicate reports and stuff. BM never offers up any info on the kids, but we are smart enough to figure things out without her help, and she still looks surprised when we show up to school or sport events that she didn't "invite" us to.