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OT - Eff Off Friday

Aniki's picture

Better late than never!!!

Eff off to:

  • People who drive 20mph. Are you sure you should even be out on the road??
  • Christmas blues. They're not creeping up - a wave CRASHED over me last night.
  • The Timecard Nazi. NO, my timesheet does NOT have a discrepancy. My boss hasn't approved it yet, you smarmy arsehole.
  • The seemingly neverending pile of medical bills. Plah.
  • Dirty dishes. I absolutely LOATHE washing dishes. Where the hell are my house elves?? Oh, that's right. I can't afford any because I'm not a pureblood.

I hope everyone has a relaxing and peaceful weekend.


ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Before any form of eff off... Love the Harry Potter reference. LMAO. 

Eff off to:

  • DH going to class and work and forgetting to message my panicked a$$ until the next morning and then giving me the "well I told you I went to work right after class and figured you'd be sleeping so I just threw my phone in my bag." Well I was not DH in fact I was worried the exhaustion got you and you got in an accident somewhere. I didn't sleep and ended up calling your mom at 4AM to see if she'd heard from you... She thought the same thing I did. That you overexhausted yourself. We had a chat. Two days later he's updating me regardless of sleeping status. But dang. The male logic right there. (I should note. When I saw him before he left for class and work... He looked about to keel over from the exhaustion)
  • All of SD9's friends having excuses and not being able to come to her party for her birthday Sad
  • Feeling like I forgot something in regards to Christmas somewhere...

I'm actually doing pretty good... Once i explained everything to DH, I've been apologized to about a hundred times now (and he HATES apologizing... He avoids it like the plague.) and he's actually updating me. 

Major Blunder's picture

I would have done the same thing as Dh, sorry but we as a Gender don't always think things through when we are trying to do right

Screww those little buggers for not comming to SD9's B-day, that sucks she needs better friends

Major Blunder's picture

Hey at least I admit it lol

He didn't want to wake her, he was trying to be considerate, we have a problem going to the next level and wondering she might be waiting up for a call / text , we are constantly in need of improvement, real fixer uppers we are  lol

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

The consideration made me want to rip my hair out and drag the sleeping children in the car to go find his a$$. LMAO

It was consideration. But still drives me batty!!!

Major Blunder's picture

He will do better, we need a little direction sometimes on how much is too much and how much is not enough, eventually you will have him well trained and then he will go rogue on you   lol

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Well Major. We need to fix that. Because gosh dangit. I was stressed as heck! LMAO

I'm pissed about it. They delayed too. They wouldn't give her an answer besides "maybe" until the day before the party... THEN they said no. It's stupid as he!!.

Major Blunder's picture

Little girls can be the most evil creatures on the planet, she seems little a dear little one and definitely deserved better, I'm sure she was very hurt.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

She was pretty upset... I've been sugar coating it with her cousin coming over and promises of it being fun still... So here's hoping!

Aniki's picture

My DH does the same bloody thing. Faulty male wiring!

That sucks about SD9's party. Sad
I'm declining an invite to a 50th bday party because it's the weekend before Christmas. Terrible timing...

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

It just occured to me SD9 is now SD10.... LOL
It is terrible timing... I wanted to do it earlier. But the forking visitation weekend! UGH!

Must be the bad wiring!!! I was so stressed! I was like "Did something happen?!?"

Major Blunder's picture

Same to everything you said Aniki except the dishwashing I actually like it, it's gives me Zen and a feeling of a job well done and complete

Not doing my own list as I am still working on the staying positive thing, fake it till I make it

Aniki's picture

Major, you are more than welcome to come and wash my dishes while I drink a Martini.

I've got the holiday blues and am also trying to fake it 'til I make it.

Major Blunder's picture

As long as I don't have to wear that French Maid outfit again Aniki, those stockings were tough to keep straight  Wacko

Holiday Blues are a pandemic, I'm reveling in every anti or non traditional xmas song I can find lol

futurobrillante99's picture

Hey Aniki darling, I'm in full on Grinch mode. Must be the holiday blues for me, too.

Work is especially busy. Working late most days. But I'll be in Dublin this time last next week.

However, I am sad.

I am sad that I only put up an itty bitty tree (tree top from a long ago Christmas tree) with two strands of lights, unbreakable ornaments and gold bead strands. This way little Miss Kitten and destroy it to her hearts content. Next year I'll do a regular sized tree - after she gets her kitten shenanigans out of her system. I will be hanging stockings, too. I have gifts bought, one wrapped LOL. Bah humbug.

I am sad that I'm cynical and jaded. I'm sad that I'm jealous of people who have had long, happy (truly happy) marriages, and that they can spend the holidays with INTACT family, and these loving couples of many decades are surrounded by their kids and grandkids.

I am sad because I have so much exposure to people (online) who are in toxic and dysfunctional situations, I'm starting to think that no families are healthy.

I am sad because there are so many damaged people walking around, and sad men my age that it now seems I have joined the league of 50+ women who will be single for the duration. Don't get me wrong - I'm not itching for anything new, but the prospects are quite dismal and discouraging out there. And sometimes frightening. I think I may need to distance myself from these online groups.

I think I need spring. I need sunshine, kayaking, walking, hiking, and biking. I need weather nice enough to put the top down on my car and drive in the mountains - FAST!

I am hopeful that my faith in healthy people and loving relationships will be restored by the people around me.

((hugs)) to y'all.


Aniki's picture

Aw, FB. {{{HUGS}}}

I'm wondering if part of your blues is due to the divorce, which is understandable. 

You need a cage around your tree!

I understand what you say about being jaded and cynical, but fight giving up and do my best to find positives every day - no matter how small.

futurobrillante99's picture

I might be fooling myself but I think I’m in a good place with the divorce. I think I’m moving closer to complete acceptance.

I don’t miss ANY of the step family BS. I think I really only miss the best, most peaceful parts of what we had. Like most people in my boat say, also grieving what was hoped for.

And wondering if anything was ever real. It wa very real for me. 

I’m grear. I’m fine. My focus on work is returning. 2019 is going to be a banner year for me.

(And knock on wood, DS22 still has the same job!!) ❤️

CLove's picture

1. Eff off - To DHs family who continually leave me out of Group "family" texts, that are all about family gatherings and planning and what everyone is bringing. But include the 12-year old CHILD who could give an eff. SO glad that I did not do a big wedding and pay and go into debt so their unappreciative selves could drink and eat. SO glad I didnt spend any money on Christmas Cards this year, for them. The entire time with DH, his famiy has basically ignored me. EVERY gathering. No, "who are you conversations" And the younger ones are snotty. And now DH is mad at ME because I said "Eff THEM". A child has more importance in planning a family gathering than his wife. His supposed equity life partner. Like the child even cares. And supposedly DH has asked them to take the child off, and they decided not to listen.

2. Eff off - to DH. See above. Hes mad at Me. And Im sitting here crying at my desk.

3. Eff off - to unappreciative co-workers. yeah Im only a temp, but cant you even say good morning or goodbye or hello?

4. Eff off - to not being able to enjoy Christmas holidays this year. Did not get to Christmas cards, and did not get to do activities. I guess when the kids grow up I need to be better at creating my own traditions, and plan my own activities. DH just hasnt been "feeling it". 


Major Blunder's picture

My Sister tend to leave my DW out of regular communication, I have asked them to please contact her on alot of things but ( and I'm not defending ) I think immediate family contacts immediate without thinking, why the kid was included is boggling to me.

The fact that he is mad at you sucks and worse that you are crying about it

If you worked at my office you would probably try and look busy if I came your way, I can be a talker round an attractive woman such as yourself

We all have the Xmas blues, join the club CLove !!!!!  We'll all be getting snookered later and singing Xmas karaoke at Aniki's  lol

CLove's picture

DH has a HUGE family. He is the youngest of 13. And there are 10 remaining. Mostly sisters and female cousins. Ive never been invited out for girls lunches, or getting nails done. Just gatherings where I am ignored.

My coworker at the temp job - the only other female btw - she said it took her SO's family 8 years. The whole time she felt left out and ignored. So she bailed on 2 Christmases and finally they came around. But previously no one had ever even asked her where she worked, or anything about her in ANY way. So, Im not alone I guess.

And to top things off, we are going to MY familys for this Christmas so said child wont even BE here, she decided to be with us this year "to change it up".

Yes, Ill bring some tequila and lime, too, for shots. 

Major Blunder's picture

I have only the two sisters and they live far away from us, most things center around her family and I am never asked I am just expected to be there, where else do I have to go? Right?

Tequilla is a danger drink for me but you'll have some interesting stories to tell, and I aologize ahead of time for anything I might do under the influence   lol

Aniki's picture

I'm so sorry, sweetie. What a bunch of arseholes. Would you like me to give your DH a Flying Five Fist Monkey Nut Punch?

If you go to any future toxic family gatherings, take a novel.

CLove's picture

A trilogy that I loved when I was a kid! My to be read list is also long.

Thank you Aniki. DH is not good with texts hes telling me now. I know this, but cannot speak freely so I text, he gets mad, lashes out.

The irony is that he has said "eff em", himself, every now and then. So, save your five fisted monkey nut punch - I may need it later. LOL.I dont know your stature, but DH is very large and burley with large arms. And he can be the sweetest of the sweetest. We will talk about things later. I definitely have bigger fish to fry. New job, soon, house...

Aniki's picture

Is it that he thinks it's okay for him to say eff em since they're his relatives.

Hon, I'm the woman men cross the street to avoid. I was a bodyguard for 6 months and was nicknamed Valkyrie for a very good reason.  *dirol*

Exjuliemccoy's picture

F Off to tradespeople who function on some alien time paradigm that causes them to ignore all professional etiquette, promises, and my attempts at project management!

I've been essentially tied down at home for the last three weeks, dealing with contractors who come and go without a word, show up hours late, and send work crews lacking in clear instructions or sometimes even the necessary tools. What should have taken ten days is stretching to a month! I know I'm whining and these are petty first world problems, but it would be nice to be able to just come and go freely, finish decorating for Xmas, and get back to normal.

Major Blunder's picture

Hey look at the bright side with all those Tradesman comming and going I'm sure you have a nice collection of Butt Cracks stored up in your recent memory lol  I know .... Ewwwwww !!!!!

NoWireCoatHangarsEVER's picture

with my friend and her two horrible daughters living with me and there is no end in site of them leaving.

I'm losing my mind and my temper.  She's now brought over her dogs as well.  Her kids are horrible.  They think I'm their maid.  They don't clean up after themselves.  She didn't even take them to school probably three out of five days this week.  And they weren't sick.  She isn't looking for a job.  It's giving me depression BAD.

I work long, long twelve hour days.  I had to work a bunch of overtime.  So I clean up after them all.  Horrible horrible messes.  Like they literally can't even walk to the damn garbage can and throw away their garbage.  So this weekend I wake up and it's like a dang soriority girl party had taken place in my living room and dining room.  Pizza boxes everywhere.  Dishes everywhere.  Applesauce EVERWHERE.  Mashmallows on the floor.  JUST MESS!  At about 11 in the afternoon I wake them up throwing a fit and tell them, I'm not their maid and to clean up their mess.  So she comes out of her room and makes them clean up.  All of my nice towels and quilts were in the backyard wet.  I dont know why.  After I laundered them, two days later my nice towels are back in the backyard left out in the rain and wet AGAIN.  

So I clean the house.  I leave for awhile. I come back and the kitchen is a dang disaster.  Spagetti mess EVEYWHERE.  There is even dried spagetti broken up all over the kitchen floor.  The white blanket I just laundered is on the floor with spagetti sauce alll over it and they have spagetti all in my living room.  I have  a strict only eat at the dining room table rule which they break constantly.  I had to pull food out from under the beds where they are stAYING.  Pizza and cookies.  Retrieve all my dishes.  I'm repeatedly saying "I don't want roaches and rats.  I have a strict no eating in the bedrooms rule!"

The sheets come off the bed and they will just sleep on the mattress and ruin my mattress until I come and put the sheets and mattress pad back on the mattress.  I am tempted to safety pin them onto the mattress.

I'm just sick and depressed. 

It's just if it were me and I was living with someone jobless, I would be looking for a job every free moment.  I would be cleaning up after my kids and making them mind!  

CLove's picture

No appreciation and your doing all the work. Give her a move out date! That should light a fire under her to job hunt.

SteppedOut's picture

What the hell?! 

Why isn't your "friend" looking for work? 

Why isn't your "friend" picking up after her children if they won't pick up after themselves?

You are a good person for allowing them to stay with you - but you have to set a limit. If "friend" isn't even looking for work...does she just expect that you are going to take care of her and her children forever? Have you discussed this with her at all?

Major Blunder's picture

I would definitely be talking about an end date with this "Friend" at this point, fish and houseguests both stink after three days, time for her to get on her feet and get moving !

Sorry for your charity being tossed in your face Nowire, you don't deserve that.

Cover1W's picture

Put a 30 day move out requirement IN WRITING. 

Make her sign it.

You have no option - however, be aware they may not move out and I hope that you don't have to go through eviction (but you can change the locks, right?

Aniki's picture

NWCH, you need to take your life back. They need to GO. Sorry, but bringing pets? Unacceptable. Along with everything else. 

Definitely give them a Get Out date AND LOCK UP YOUR STUFF. Bedding, good towels, FOOD...

Cover1W's picture

I'm pretty good actually.  I have only one comment.

Eff Off to DH's huge laundry pile. I stopped helping at all if he doesn't put his stuff IN the laundry basket. I mean, It's right there in the closet - yet he persists in creating a pile so large, RIGHT NEXT TO the laundry basket, that it's now hiding his shelves and his hangars are almost all bare.  His selection of clothing yesterday was interesting to say the least.  I have given him enough warnings.  The cleaning woman (bless her) is coming tomorrow and I told DH that if he didn't clean up his stuff I would do it for him and he didn't want that did he?  Well, I'm going to be up early and likely putting all that stuff in trash bags and tossing them in his office. 

It's giving me SD14 flashbacks.

Dash 1

Major Blunder's picture

DW does the same thing throughout the week, a pile just steps from the hamper, I just don't get it, how exhausted are you that you can't turn and toss, not even have to walk to the hamper, it's THAT CLOSE !!!!!  However she does split laundry duty over the weekend so it doesn't pile up for weeks on end thaqt would send me over the edge.

Cover1W's picture

Exactly.  I mean he doesn't even have to turn and toss!  Just reach arm out and release!

I like doing laundry so don't mind doing his but he must appropriately get it ready for laundry and put it away.  I don't do it all.

And we're on septic so we cannot do like 5 loads in a day - it's better do do several loads over a week and he cannot let it stack up.

Glassslipper's picture

Eff off to dishes too, but not the dirty ones, the ones DH and I picked out because al the old ones got chipped and smashed by the skids ramming them violently into the countertop!
Got the new dished a few months now and 3 bowls are chipped, 2 plates are chipped and one dessert plate is completly shattered

Cover1W's picture

This is why I require things to be bought at thrift store only and why my good dishes and glasses are NOT out for general use.