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SD want's to be a pastry chef

alieigh21's picture

Submitted by alieigh21 on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 3:11pm

SD has decided to be a pastry chef. She can't cook; Has never really shown an interest in cooking; and has less than 1/4 of what it would cost to go to the school she has chosen.

Pretty sure this is going to end up being one more way I'm the bad guy. Since DH refused to borrow a years salary to pay her tuition.

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alieigh21's picture

Submitted by alieigh21 on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 3:39pm

It's funny, DH talked to another student while he was waiting for SD at the school. He said the same thing about beginning work at 3-4am. My instinct is that she has no real understanding of what it would be like. She has a very hard time accepting constructive criticism. The school was VERY expensive. She would need almost $30,000 after taking the maximum direct loans.

DH would never borrow money without discussing it with me first. I'm not saying there is never a time we would consider it but I would have to be very confident that the education would pay off and that they would finish.

My BS is in grad school and BD is in undergrad. I've helped them both with undergrad but only to the extent I can afford it. Each of them knew when they started how much I could help and how much they needed to fund themselves. Both will graduate with less than 6 months salary in debt.

tryingmom's picture

Submitted by tryingmom on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 4:42pm

Starting pay for good pastry chefs are about $12 an hour. You have to put in years of work and learning beyond school to really start to make decent money. Another thing to consider, most restaurants do not pay for your tools. Special pans, tools and silpats are at the pastry chef's expense.

alieigh21's picture

Submitted by alieigh21 on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 4:37pm

I agree completely. She was accepted and had planned on taking a couple of classes before she got this ides. I was all for that, even if it meant us helping was more me helping. I earn quite a bit more than DH. It's normally not an issue with me and DH.

To her it feels like a double standard. She thinks because I've helped pay for my kids college I somehow owe her the same. The truth is I've helped them far less than she realizes. Both of my bio kids have had scholarships and student loans. The rest came from their fathers life insurance and the college savings we put back while we were married. She is not entitled to either. Any help she gets will come from our discretionary budget.

alieigh21's picture

Submitted by alieigh21 on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 4:24pm

Exactly, I considered being a chef when I was much younger. By the time I was 14 I could cook dinner for the family and now I can make pretty much anything I try to. But in the interest of security I decided to be a CPA instead of a chef. Best decision I ever made! I'm a good cook but probably would have been an average chef.

With my bio kids I could see how their career choices fit with their interests and felt like they could make a living doing it. This is certainly not the case here.

tryingmom's picture

Submitted by tryingmom on Thu, 09/04/2014 - 4:35pm

My son is a chef, food is a passion for him. His culinary arts associates degree cost $48K. I did not help pay for it, he got grants, scholarships and federal school loans. If she wants to be a pastry chef there are programs for just that. Perhaps she should get a job at Walmart's or any grocery store bakery to see what the hours and work load are. It isn't glamorous until you make it big time.