Facebook official
Is a relationship status childish?
The last time I had one, it was after my ex and I got engaged. I couldn't wait to change it so everyone would know I was getting married (GAG).
In August everyone became well aware that it was over between ex and I when he started Facebook bashing me (mature for a 35 year old man, right).
New boyfriend mentioned that we were still "single" in the world of social media and suggested perhaps we change it? I am considering, since we had the "exclusive" talk recently.
But... I can't help but feel like it is a tad childish. "In a relationship with" feels sort of high-school to me, and it also tells the masses that AJ jumped back into a relationship quickly after things were finalized with scumbag. I always did care too much what people think...
What are your thoughts on going "official" with the status?
- AJanie's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Don't do it. You're not 100%
Don't do it. You're not 100% comfortable with it, regardless of the reasons.
Childish and it screams LOOK
Childish and it screams LOOK AT ME
I have never been friends with a SO, much less announced to the world who I'm involved with.
The current guy I'm with doesn't even use social media which is actually nice.
That's my DF- he has NO
That's my DF- he has NO social media and is actually pretty inept w/computers.
I’d assume people like your
I’d assume people like your friends and family know you are dating, so who the announcement is for? Strangers? People know I am married. Who else I need to announce it to? I am not interested in social media but I am a bit surprised people block and unfriend their own spouses? Gee.
I know ouch, but futuro's dh
I know ouch, but futuro's dh is kind of a massive di**
agreed.... but hiding the
agreed.... but hiding the relationship status during a fight is just as big a di** move. It was done TO HURT.
Nimrod used FB as a passive
Nimrod used FB as a passive aggressive tool. He would change his profile pic to just him if he was mad at me. It got to be so obvious that he would do that and friends would text asking me what had i made him mad about this time. When i had emergency surgery with complications and he no showed, i confronted him and he removed pics again because i put a status on thanking my parents and friends for caring for me during that time. It infuriated him that i made him “look bad”. I said you made you look bad. Didn’t need any help. Then i filed for divorce. The day he was served, i unfriended him and most of his insane family. Some of my friends stayed on his go spy and it’s been humorous. Lmao
Some
People aren’t mature enough to handle social media.
I changed mine when SO and I
I changed mine when SO and I got engaged but this is our first for both of us. I did it mostly to let family know in a mass was. I think before I had that up I am pretty sure I had no relationship status at all.
I am 32 and I can honestly say, it is just Facebook and in the big scheme of things like life it means nothing. I would just ignore and let it go and just not have a status at all. Leave it blank you can do that. If they guy your are dating has an issue with it and pushes it guess what he has insecurities. In your 30's people should be content and happy with one another and be secure in knowing what they have between one another.
My opinion.
There is nothing official
There is nothing official about Facebook.
I would just leave it alone or do you have to have a relationship status? I don't have FB, so I don't know!
Why do people on social media need to know?
People on social media are my
People on social media are my friends/family- I announced our engagement several years back- other then that my relationship status had always been hidden. I'll likely update when we get married. When we do, we will elope so quickest way to announce it to our loved ones.
I'm not one to have hundreds and hundreds of friends though.
My marriage license is
My marriage license is official. Ha Facebook is just Facebook.
"Official" to me is more like
"Official" to me is more like putting a ring on it so I wouldn't sweat the non-bling, non-lifetime commitment Facebook Official.
^^^^^^^^^^^ What
^^^^^^^^^^^
What FuturoBrillante just said!
I have to say, my SO and I «announced» our relationship on fb after a little argument where I was angry that he didn't tell a potential female business provider that he was in a relationship.
He defended himself saying his relationship status is personal and «none of her business», which would have been fine by me, except that in their conversation, she mentionned that she didn't have a BF and «didn't want one», and he talked about his divorce and his DD. So I called BS on things being strictly business between them. If he can mention his Ex and DD, he can certainly mention my existence!
As is turned out, the morning we argued about it, I was checking my fb account on my laptop and an ex-boyfriend happened to have sent me a message, asking if I was single, saying he was still thinking of me, that he was never far, and so on.
I turned and told my SO, «but he doesn't need to know that I'm in a relationship, does he? It's none of his business }:) »
Later that day, SO made it official with me on fb
It's gay. I hate it. If you
It's gay. I hate it. If you change it, a stupid post will show up on your news feed announcing to every one that you are "in a relationship". Do you really want that? To me that's for attention whoring teenagers.
Since I'm FB ranting, also please do not post snap chat pictures with stupid cat ears and nose and creepy weird eyes. Just.don't.do.it.
Since I'm FB ranting, also
Since I'm FB ranting, also please do not post snap chat pictures with stupid cat ears and nose and creepy weird eyes. Just.don't.do.it.
^^^^^^^
Challenge accepted!
haha oh boy!
haha oh boy!
“Since I'm FB ranting, also
“Since I'm FB ranting, also please do not post snap chat pictures with stupid cat ears and nose and creepy weird eyes. Just.don't.do.it.”
Oh, I hate those filters, they are just creepy.
BM posted one without the ears or nose but it smoothed her skin and made her eyes sparkling. Someone commented on how blue and sparkly her eyes were, she replied that they’ve always been like that.
The person laughed and pointed out that the filter name was in the corner of the picture, BM quickly deleted the picture, lol.
I changed it to nothing!
I changed it to nothing! Perfect!
I didn’t change mine to
I didn’t change mine to anything until after we were married. I just had my status as unlisted. Therefore I wasn’t showing as “single” but I wasn’t sitting there throwing statuses all over the web. Lol.
Only do it if and when you want to though! You could always just remove the status being listed altogether even!
Great discussion and comments
Great discussion and comments everyone!
#firstworldproblems
I would be offended if my
I would be offended if my newly committed boyfriend wouldn’t put that were in a relationship. To me it would seem like he’s hiding our relationship. And if I were you I would be happy that he is wanting to do that, to me that means he’s proud of being with you.
If people in you a day to day
If people in you a day to day life know about your relationship,that shoukd be enough. Why do you NEED for people that you went to school with 30 years ago, to know? :? :?
If a man got offended by my not posting about us on social media, his days with me would be numbered. To be offended by that makes one seem needy and insecure. I have zero tolerance for needy and/or insecure adults.
Do you know how many guys
Do you know how many guys from high school and college used to send me "I have always loved you" messages before I changed my status to married? It was often enough that it would have made any man jealous. Why invite those unwanted overtures?
Do you wear a wedding ring? Why? Why does anyone need to know? I'm always a bit put off by people who don't wear their rings.
You really think a status
You really think a status will keep folks from sending an I have always loved you message??. Some men(and women) view the status as a challenge.LOL
Any man that would get jealous over a message THAT I DID NOT ENCOURAGE ANDD THAT I SHUT DOWN ASAP, is petty and insecure. I don't deal with insecure men.
I've never met anyone who was
I've never met anyone who was totally secure in themselves without being arrogant, which is a cover for being insecure lol. Everyone has insecurities. My wedding ring doesn't keep every single unwanted comment away, but they are a whole lot less frequent. And just because some people behave inappropriately doesn't mean I won't wear my ring.
Yes, we all have
Yes, we all have insecurities. But if your insecurities make you question my faithfulness, then I don't want you in my life.
I'm not walking on eggshells and changing the way I interact with others simply because you have issues.
No one said anything about
No one said anything about walking on eggshells lol. People can feel jealous without acting like an ass. It is a natural feeling, just like sadness and anger, it's on the icky side of emotions. I do what I can to limit the number of times my spouse feels icky because I love him.
I just don't understand
I just don't understand feeling jealous because someone else is attracted to your spouse.
If your spouse responds in a manner that encourages the attention, then it's time to be jealous/angry.
Maybe the difference is that
Maybe the difference is that the people I went to high school with were 10 years ago.... many of them I still have friendships with. And I don’t see it as being insecure at all, social media plays a part in people’s lives now and if my partner wouldn’t “claim” me or have pictures or things on his profiles I would assume he’s up to no good.
“Do you wear a wedding ring?
“Do you wear a wedding ring? Why? Why does anyone need to know? I'm always a bit put off by people who don't wear their rings.“
I agree with you!
Relationship status are today’s equivalent of being pinned, or wearing a wedding band. It’s a symbol that shows the outside world you are in a committed relationship.
DH isn’t on any social media but if he were and he changed his status to single I would be as upset as if he’d taken his wedding band off.
Considering how often social
Considering how often social media is used to "hook up" or emotionally cheat on partners, it is not childish to update your relationship status. It's being honest with everyone. I would be .more than a bit suspicious if I were in a serious relationship with someone who wanted to remain appearing single and available online.
I don't have my status
I don't have my status public...yes it's immature. But just have it set to no relationship status....
I don't have my status
I don't have my status public...yes it's immature. But just have it set to no relationship status....
I met my DH on FB. We lived
I met my DH on FB. We lived about 3 hours apart. When we connected and he moved to my area he wanted to change our relationship status right away. He’d been divorced about 6-7 years but dated a lot of women. He’s very attractive and lots of women were interested in him.
He looked at changing his relationship status as a way to easily convey the message that he was taken. I went along with it although I was not nearby as committed as he was. My dh was very smitten and in love with me long before I was ready to commit.
DH doesn't have a fb account,
DH doesn't have a fb account, but uses mine occasionally to chit chat with some of his family members.
I don't really post much on there. What happens between us is our business - I don't feel the need to "brag" to everyone every time DH does something nice for me, and I don't feel the need to make a production of announcing a relationship change.