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BM tirade

AJanie's picture

Skid weekend recap.

BM told DH to get them at 8:00 Friday (instead of 5:00) because SD had a bday party to go to. She is court ordered to drop them off, but never does.

He went at 8:00 and got them.

Weekend was good, busy, tiring... the usual. DH gets a call Sunday at 6:00, it is BM losing her shit because skids aren't home. Drop off is normally 5:00 but DH was going to drop them off for 8:00 (showered and ready for bed) because he lost out on 3 hours Friday. This is how the court order works and has always worked.

She starts on her tirade which quickly turns into money. She tells him he should be "thankful" because she pays cable and electric (??????? :? ) and she does "everything" including dropping SD off at gymnastics once per week. He reminded her he would gladly spend more time with the skids but she fought for EOW visitation. He would have no issue taking her to gymnastics if BM had a waitressing shift or some other pressing situation to attend to.

We are having trouble comprehending how she gets $800 month in child support plus half of activities, has her waitressing and live in boyfriend ... yet still is having meltdowns. It seems she thinks she is entitled to *alimony* but forgets they were not married.

It really sickens me how this woman thinks she has it so hard. My closest friend is a single mom who pays for it all, keeps her daughter in year round sports (not just one lousy hour of gymnastics per week for 6 weeks - it took BM TWO YEARS to even sign her up for that) and my friend works 40+ hours. BM HAS NO IDEA.

Thanks for letting me get that out - I was ready to explode at her yesterday. Thankfully, I kept my zen.


ESMOD's picture

It sucks to have that drama fly into your home!

Did your DH confirm the later drop off? If not, it might be good to confirm that stuff in writing.

Like. BM, I am fine picking up Skids at 8 pm but will be dropping them off on Sunday at 8pm to compensate for the late pickup. Please reply to confirm your understanding.

AJanie's picture

I don't think he did. He always makes up the time (within reason) - she knows this. She just felt like yelling at someone.

But I know what you mean - he should remind her regardless. Can't hurt.

ESMOD's picture

He could even do it without asking for her agreement.

Just a statement.

BM, for avoidance of doubt, I will be dropping the kids off at 8 pm since I was told not to pick them up until 8 on Friday.

Maxwell09's picture

You know we used to deal with drama every week with BM. If it wasn't this it was that. She had this entitlement issue as yours does, and we thought after a judge told her being Mom isn't all that matters she would quiet down but she kept it up for as long as she was with Babydaddy2. I don't know you or your BM's but the BM I deal with tried to make our life miserable whenever her life was miserable. We don't know if she caused friction with us to prove to her then boyfriend she was over SO or if she just felt the need to make everyone as unhappy as she was in a way to think she was doing better than us. It all stopped when she started dating again and snagged a normal guy. He isn't about the drama and makes pretty decent money so she is hiding her crazy for as long as she can to get married. It could also be that she is busy creating chaos with Babydaddy2 now trying to prove she is happier and over him to the new guy. My point is that she won't stop until she is good and ready OR something/one has her too occupied to create chaos in your life. Tell your DH to ignore her and when he does respond to text (I suggest email only) make it one word/letter answers if possible. I know BM flipped when DH told her to contact him only through email. She said he wasn't communicating and that was part of the custody order. He told her email is a form of communication and it is the only one he will respond to from here on out. The drama cut down by a lot because honestly, who has the time to draft up an email every time they have something to b!tch about?

Limit communication and ignore the whore. Find comfort in knowing she is making you miserable because she is miserable or bored with her life and will eventually have to move on.

AJanie's picture

I suspect she starts the drama when she is unhappy... which is frequently. Her boyfriend now, upon information and belief, has a bit of a temper and isn't as tolerant of her bullshit as her last boyfriend.

I suspected she was pregnant but she still has her bouts of drunk slurring so she isn't. I just want her to MOVE ON.

Aniki's picture

Egads, I hope she isn't preggers. Sorry the beeyotch was beeyotchy. {{hugs}}

StepUltimate's picture

This has been extremely successful with my DH & the BM. She waaaay too lazy to type up her extensive bullsh*t. This was before DH & SS17 got custody order flipped & SS was still living with BM. Love never having to hear DH speak with her, and DH loves it too. Plus, text screenshots made lovely Exhibits when we attached them to our CS order!! Switching to 100% written communication is extremely beneficial.