Dontfeedthetrolls's Blog

How is your mom?

Looking for advice or if anyone can share about their experience on how to speak to the kids about their mom.

Let me start by saying SO and his ex do not co-parent well. There are some positive moments but they are typically laced with ulterior motives on BM’s part. She can be very high conflict when she doesn’t get her way. She constantly lies and plays the victim as well as basically ignoring my partner’s role in his children’s lives.

No missed calls

So apparently SO NEVER accpts BM's calls.

Her father called to check what was up and explained that she was being a bit of a b*tch. Claiming SO never accepts her calls. Odd we don't show any missed calls? Odd she didn't text SO or use the parenting app? Odd they were taxing over some kids stuff yesterday but no SO never let her speak to the kids when they are with us.

Crying Mommy

I’ve brought this up before but I’m not sure if there’s a better way to handle this.

SO’s little one is 5. He and his sister have been completing every other weekend visitation in our home for over a year now. There have been no problems or major changes in our home or living situation since my partner moved in.

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BM punishing SO

Well BM is back to her crap of using the kids to punish SO. She's pissed that he is actually sticking to the order and not giving up his Spring Break.... Go figure it's like he cares about spending time with his kids. You know he requested off months ago for this time but really it’s all just so she can’t have them.

So yeah to get back at him she is refusing to let him see them outside of the mandatory time which is in all fairness her right BUT does lead me to this question.

Ding Dong the wicked witch is back.

EVERY F*CKINGTIME.

She makes me so angry. BM is already starting the b*llsh*th again about the holiday. I read that damn paper 30 times so I know what it says left to right, up and down, and backwards. We get them on even years from 5PM the day school lets out till 5PM the day before they go back. She’s trying the same old bull about “that’s the wrong order.”

F*CK NO IT’S NOT.

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Spring break AKA works being stupid

Spring break is getting so close and I’m so excited. We “let it slip” that we are going the zoo over spring break. The kids quickly chimed in about how much they enjoyed the zoo we’ve been to. Yep we’ll let them keep thinking that. Really we are going on a longer trip with “the zoo” being only one tiny bit of our plans.

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Withholding insurance cards.

BM appears to be withholding the children’s insurance information though the CO clearly states she is to provide copies of their insurance cards to my partner.

She’s using the excuse that she hasn’t received the cards yet and is blaming it on the state since they now receive state funded insurance.

However, she has taken both children to see the doctor this year and even had to get medication for one which is how SO found out they were insured through the state.

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Child was told not to take showers.

I realize my last post could not convey what was going on and I've had some pretty major assumptions that very much disturbed me. Some even trying to say that we must be trying to get the 8 year old to use a douch which I find very disturbing.

So fine. BM is in the habit of dying the children's hair with different "accent" colors. SO is ok with this because the children do express that they want it and personally we don't believe it is harmful and the school does allow it. So good, let them express themselves.

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Meaningless annoyance

I wanted to ask what are those little things that annoy you abut this kind of family life but really aren't that big of a deal.

For example when the kids are over it means I have to ware a shirt to bed. We have cats so our door is rarely fully shut so that's not an option. It's really no big deal in the larger picture but still a tiny annoyance.

Anyone got anything else? You know just the small stuff. Not the things that make us question if we really want to stay in these relationships.

It will be done

SO has a meeting next week with his lawyer. If I understand correct and this is all true the lawyer has what is suppose to be the final copy of the divorce degree and custody order. SO will get to look over it. If he doesn't have any issues with it he'll sign it and Friday it will go into affect. So Friday my partner could finally be done with this.

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