DH and I got into a fight and I gave up
DH complained to me again about SS11's weight. I have talked with SS11, he understands he is over weight. He is not willing to do anything about it at this time. While at our house he eats appropriate for his age and height, and we serve only nutritious foods to the whole family.
He is overeating at BM's. It's very clear. DH recently pulled up at BM's and saw her groceries as she was unloading and he didn't see anything nutritious. Not even a fruit. Just a bunch of packaged foods and sweets. Their entire family (save for SS11's younger brother) is overweight, obese actually.
DH can't talk to SS11 about his weight because BM attacks DH when the conversation even comes up. Claiming he's making SS11 feel bad about himself blah blah. It's been years and years since SS11 stepped on a scale at my mom's house and discovered he had "gained weight" and went back to tell his mom who tore DH a new one.
At any rate; DH doesn't know how to discuss it with BM. There is literally no way he can bring it up that she will be receptive to it. I asked him if he'd like to try mediation and he said yes and asked me to find out some info.
So I did. Because that's what I do. And DH talked with the mediator and then completely shut it down. He said he thought BM would just be so offended that she would just walk out. He didn't even want to try.
I'm sick of buying new clothes for this kid and her keeping them. She has 4 brand new outfits over there and when SS11 tried to bring them back he told me she said she needed them to send him in next time. In actuality she needs them because he can't fit any of his clothes due to his constant weight gain.
I told DH I was done. That he wasn't to speak to me about SS11's weight or clothes again unless he plans to actually do something about it. I swore at him, locked myself in my office to "work" and typed up this blog instead.
I love my DH but honestly he's being such a wimp about this. This lady is going to ruin SS11's life. I screamed at DH "I CAN'T CARE MORE THAN HIS BIO PARENTS, I'M DONE!"
We rarely fight so I'm pretty upset about this. But also a bit relieved to not have to hear how disappointed DH is in BM's unhealthy lifestyle anymore.