Something has happened yet again that has me scratching my head. I wonder if this is a usual thing that happens with anyone else??? Anyhow,I welcome anything that anyone has to add on this. OK....here we go. In my situation I have a DH of several years now. He has two sons from a past relationship. DH and I don't have any children together yet.
The thing in question here is the fact that the BM in his case does something sometimes that I think is kind of weird. Apparently,she gets it in her head every now and then that I am pregnant. In *former* times of my getting along with her...she asked me if I was(pregnant) and told me how she just thought of it so much that she had to ask me if I was or not. She has done this several times now. Just last week,she sent DH a text asking if I was pregnant. He sent her one back saying no I wasn't and why did she ask. She replies with how she had such a vivid dream of me having a baby/being pregnant. Her exact wording or description of her dream slips my mind at the moment.
She doesn't do this constantly. This is probably the third time in a period of a couple of years. I just find it odd that it is even a thought in her head. I guess she dreams of it and believes her dreams might be true. To me I find it kind of weird. I personally wonder if it isn't along the lines of being a fear for her or something. I just find that ODD that I know that she thinks of it and thinks of it until she has to ask to get it out of her head whether I am pregnant or not. What do you guys think? Do you think it is fear/anxiety? I often wonder if the thought of my having his child bothers her or something. That my having a child of his would take away that she wouldn't be the only woman to have his kids. He thinks she'll flip out when the time comes.
Anyone else have experiences like this? I welcome your stories/opinions/comments and anything else you would like to add.
It's not quite the same, but
DH's ex was CONSTANTLY bugging him about when we were going to have kids under the guise of "friendly" conversation. It only ended this summer after he got a vasectomy.
I think it was two things; an automatic assumption that women *must* want babies and will "oopsie!" the man (she did). Or, she was trying to anticipate him crying poor and trying to reduce CS because "kids are sooo expensive!". Or, she was looking for an excuse to make up stuff about me. Who knows?
DH and I married 133 days after we met, and the first words out of her mouth were, "Is Trish pregnant??" Because obviously, who would marry the man she cheated on and treated like crap unless she was? Gotta get into the BM way of thinking here.
Next time she ask tell her yes .......... with TWINS!
My SS's SpermGrandMa has asked a few times over the years. Mainly because adding a kid to our half of the blendedfamily situation would push the balance of CS heavier to my SS's SpermDad's side than it is. By the CS formula my Lovely Bride is ~65-70% financially responsible for my SS. SpermDad still pays almost $400.00/mo. Us having a child would cost SpermDad some cash on a monthly basis.
SpermGrandMa is nervous because she is the one that pays her son's CS obligation.
Anyway, have some fun with this and play up your "pregnancy" with twins. I would love to see the look on her face after you tell them about the pending little bundles of joy.
Best regards,
Not so weird....
I have dreamed several times that my ex and his wife were expecting a baby. He had a vasectomy while we were still married and I know that he would never want to have another baby. Not sure why I have dreamed it, but I have had about 2 or 3 times. I don't have any desire to be back with him and don't care about their lives. They have done some things that I didn't approve of with my kids around so I don't know if that triggers it or not. I wouldn't even care if they had a baby. It might distract from my kids and he would leave me alone. So, no explanation for it but it has happened to me. I would never tell him or ask her about it though.
it could be a few things
she could be worrying about her hefty CS "paycheck" and wondering when it will go down bc most likely it will if u have a baby. she could be worried about her kids and how they will handle it. or she could just want to be the only one to have his kids and if u do, then she wont be special anymore in her little head. either way, ur DH needs to tell her to knock it off bc if and when y'all do get pregnant, its really none of her business.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
I think you are spot on
She is terrified of losing her special 'mother of his children' title.
She may well go ballistic when you do get pregnant, but she'll get over it. Its just another one of those seperation stages that have to happen. Another tie thats broken.
Are you and DH married? How did she cope with that news?
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