I come home from work to hear BF on the phone with BM and youngest SS stb 6. "Yesssssss Daddy will pick you up at 3:30 tomorrow" Then to BM: "We don't have anything going on so it's ok" (how the HELL does he know I have nothing going on??? He never asked me!!)
Apparently BM is going to the hospital overnight Friday and two oldest skids will be staying with HER mother. I think she's going in for an additional set of fallopian tubes so she can ovulate twice a month instead of the regular once a month.
Anyway, newly remarried BM feels compelled to say that she will be going in to the hospital Friday night but coming back on Saturday morning. and BF says "Is everything OK?"
I'm sure she got a tickle out of that one; she's probably thinking "he still cares about me."
So BF once again, without asking me agrees to taking SS for the 2nd weekend in a row all the way through Sunday.
Fast forward to this morning. Now BF calls up and says "I have to work Saturday, do you feel comfortable having Junior over while I work?"
NOW after everything that has transpired in the last month where he wanted me to leave the house when skids came over as I was "intimidating" SD in particular to "I don't want you to have anything to do with skids parenting; leave that to me" and now this???!!
Frankly I don't feel comfortable having him over now that he is old enough to articulate (and to make up stories about things) BF would certainly take SS's word over mine (although he took BM's word over SD's when CPS called him b/c supposedly BM made SD walk outside in the snow with no shoes on as a punishment)
He has recently told me that if SD should ever have a "bad report" about me, then "it would not be good for me." I take that as a physical threat. SD and BM have already made up stories and pushed a fake CPS report though that took me 6 months to over turn.
If I tell BF that I don't feel comfortable b/c SS is old enough now to make up stories, that would be perceived as "something negative" against his precious angels which he told me he doesn't want to hear.
I told him that if Junior wants to come over (and by gum I will disengage as mucb as possible as one can while "babysitting) then ok. I have a feeling though that b/c of the constant PAS and b/c BM and her mother don't want me anywhere NEAR her "babies" when BF isn't around, they will back out. I can only hope!!
uh uh...no way crayon!
after he told u that, that should be the last straw. there is no way in hell i wouuld watch that kid for a myriad of reasons, including phony abuse allegations, BUT the kicker is that BF told u he didnt want ur input or involvement regarding the skids, but NOW its okay for u to babysit?? no freakin way. PLUS he didnt ask if u had plans before he agreed to take them so again, NO FREAKIN WAY.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
He has never asked me in advance if skids
could come over nor has he stuck to a regular visitation plan. He lets the BM to the talkin' and the walkin' It all revolves around the BM's convenience.
He views my house as HIS and that his kids are welcome ANYTIME in HIS house no matter what.
I might just come down with the flu tonight bwa ha ha ha
This is clearly
from the "have my cake and eat it to" department
I would say the bm's NEW dh
I would say the bm's NEW dh should be watching the kid as she goes into the hospital.
I would tell BF no, sorry, I am to have no input or ability to set rules, so I am NOT watching him.
Bm's new DH
will be holding her hand as she gets her second set of tubes and ovaries sewn in.
Oh Crayon my friend, I think
Oh Crayon my friend, I think it's time to put your foot down so hard that there is a hole in the floor. He is disrespecting you on so many levels and I am so sorry that you have to deal with this.
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
Crayon you deserve so much
Crayon you deserve so much better than that. You deserve to be treated as his equal. Seems to me that he wants what you have to offer but he doesn't really want you. You are a wonderful woman (I have been reading many of your posts). As much as he counts on you for what you offer you really should ask yourself what is he offereing you? You don't owe him anything, everything you have is because of your efforts, seems he just wants to cash in on that. I say you should just kick him out and tell him to take his kids with him. You can find a much better man out there that will treat you as if you are his world.
Reality is always controlled by the people who are most insane.
~Dogbert
My sweet
dear Crayon! Use that crayon to scribble his dumb arse out of your life! YOUR house is HIS house? What you do with YOUR weekend is 100000% up to YOU!!!!!!! Once you understand that in your core, your behavior will change. It will make you stronger & as a result, HIS behavior will change or NOT!!!!!
There are many other men WITHOUT out there that will not disrespect you like this.
I say push the envelope to see what a creep he is-----get a "bad" report and seeeee what his arse does!!!!! Then let him have it with double barrels & then shove his clothes in the barrels for good measure and roll them out of the driveway!!!!
Don't wait for it---take charge, be proactive.
I'll be damned if I would babysit for some other woman's infertility treatments-----------------NO F WAYYYYYYYYYYY!
At minimum
he should have more appreciation for your stand-up comedy skills - I cracked up at the '2nd set of ovaries installation'-!! I think he is just blowing wind which ever way it goes that day but he can't really do anything to you, can he.
I just figured out, this was your boot camp day when you tried to make a man out of a mouse - I commend you for that, even if dh doesn't!! I figure you must get enough of what you need from dh that he is worthwhile to you, and trust if that ever changes, he is out!
There is an old saying I say as a JOKE! that 'all women marry beneath them'. that there is hardly any guy worth the fantastic creatures that we are (no offense to Steve, Rags, etc.), so what else is new! ha!
and you are right - this is the post that finally blew up StepTalk! Hopefully it is fully reinforced now as the holidays are coming - help!!!
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
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