HI everyone. I know I have no right to be upset about this but I am. My dh ex is an attractive girl but really lacks in class. She had an affair with her best friends husband (that's what broke up the marriage) and her best friend told me about a site that the ex is on. It is dating site. I have absolutely now problem with that...it is the pictures that are on there. She is posing in her underwear and seductive poses. I was totally in shock. My husband was disgusted. The problem I have is that she has my SD and I worry about the men that she will attract. My Sd has been introduced to a couple of men that her mom has dated. She falls in love after only a month and then it is over. You hear about so many bad things that happen. Is it our business? Should my Dh tell her we saw the pics and how he feels? Or is it none of our business she is a grown woman who is free to meet men however she wishes?
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weekend off for dating?
Hi Tyra,
This would really scare me if it were my kids! I agree there is nothing wrong with online dating if that's your thing but seductive pictures are just advertising for a certain kind of attention. That's really touchy bringing it up though. Something should be said even if it's about keeping the dating and "new men" to herself on the weekends when your SD is with you.
I grew up in a divorced family with a mom that dated a lot of different guys. Not good in my experience from the kid's view.
Good Luck!
Internet dating sites can be
Internet dating sites can be very dangerous. I’ve heard some real horror stories, so I would be concerned too.
If you say something about the site, isn’t she going to wonder how you found out about it? It’s not like you and your husband would be checking out dating sites.
I think your husband might want to keep the discussion specific to his concerns with Mom's boyfriends coming in and out of daughter's life and not mention internet site.
This is just my opinion.
BELIEVE ME!!!
Internet dating sites can either bring you a husband or bring you a TON of trouble. I've had it both ways.
Now, the posing of the pictures, I would be REALLY concerned with...but yes, she would wonder HOW you guys found out if it is brought up...hmmm...let me think on this a moment...
I mean, your DH could totally BUST her and tell her it doesn't MATTER how he found out, but he found out (which would cause a world of trouble...)...and I could see her going "well what blankety blank business is it of yours at which point your husband could fire back, plenty, I don't want these creeps around my kids!!!
Hmmm...I like what was said about
"Something should be said even if it's about keeping the dating and "new men" to herself on the weekends when your SD is with you."
I don't know what DH's relationship with his ex is, though...is he in a position where he *could* say "I would appreciate it if..."...I mean, does the ex have enough sense to keep these jokers away from her kids???? I would think so, I'd like to HOPE so, but you NEVER KNOW. :|
xo
Paranoid
I never had the “ton of
I never had the “ton of trouble” but an online community is where my husband saw my web page and contacted me. It wasn’t a dating site per say…that was 4 years ago “and they lived happily ever after….*smile* of course, you do have to wonder what type of man would contact a woman who is presenting herself as a virtual hooker! VERY SCARY for the kids!
Make a GREAT Day!
Sooo dangerous...
This woman sounds plain stupid to me.. I would 100% tell her that you have both seen the pictures and documented what she is doing... I seriously doubt if the friend who told you about it would care. Now... IF you are going for custody...I would even go to the point of setting her up (before you tell her)and using it in any futue court cases for custody. A woman that can resort to this behaviour to attract men is not a fit mother. What kind of man would meet with a woman like that? What diseases may he have, what if, during their online chats, she mentions she has kids, they meet at her home... and he drugs her... I may be taking this all a bit too far, but WHAT IF?? Its a crazy world out there. Can you imagine if a FATHER was found out behaving like this? His kids would be taken from him in a heartbeat!
dangerous
you think the same way I do. she is insane to expose herself and her daugther to this. We are in court again in one year so forsure we are documenting all of this. Her head is so far up her ass that she wouldn't even think that there is anything wrong with this. She has a new body since her divorce and will do whatever she can to show it off. Has sworen never to have another child...doesn't want to wreck her body. She is that kind of selfish witch.
Sorry I am just so pissed right now...just saw new pics on the site that include SD. What kind of woman would behave like this? My husband and in laws swear she was never this kind of person. What happens once they get divorced? Hell I am divorced (no kids) and I would never prositute myself like that. I think I have far more class to behave in such a way.
Why is it just anyone can have kids? What happens to the little ones? Now I know even more that I have an important role in SD life. Even if no one wants to admit that I am important I know that I am. I want her to be a strong, self respecting woman. The way my parents raised me. I guess I shouldn't be surprised she did this after all sleep with her best friend's husband.
She really does make me mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pics
I wouldn't tell her that you saw the pics. She is only going to get defensive right from the start if dh does that. If I was you (dh)I would bring up that all having all these different men in her lives is affecting sd in an unhealthy way. As soon as she gets close to one of biomom's boyfriends he's gone. And Karen has a point, one of these guys might be a sicko you never know...So sitting back and doing nothing about it would be just as wrong. Just remember this is a very delicate issue and she is sure to be on the defense about this after all this is her personal life you are talking about.
new pics
I don't think her ex friend would care if we told the ex that she told us about the pics. She destroyed her marriage and has zero love for her.
Things have changed now as well..on the internet site she has pictures of her in your underwear, bikini etc but has added a new picture that includes her daugther. I am simply appalled that anyone would even consider putting their daugther on such a site. Doesn't she watch the news? Don't pedophiles often get to the mom first so they can get to the daugther?
Question: Can my dh get the courts to make her remove his daugther off the site?
I am still speechless.....just saw the pictures.
You are absolutely correct!
You are absolutely correct! Pedophiles look for kids who come from single-parent homes. They pretend to like the child's single mom to get to her child. It's very scary.
I think you need to contact your attorney regarding the removal of the pictures of your SD from the site. I would think something could be done.
What is she thinking!
I was thinking, maybe your
I was thinking, maybe your DH could contact the site and find out if they would remove the picture of SD.
What??
What on earth has she got a picture of her daughter on her page for??? How old is her daughter? This is sooooo wrong. If I was her dad I would report this, no matter the consequences.... Does the daughter know about the pictures and if she doesnt, maybe she should? Maybe she should be the one to tell her mother that she doesnt respect what she is doing, sometimes the only people that can hit us where it counts are our children...
my Sd is only 5 years old.
my Sd is only 5 years old. We have considered the ramifications of this and have decided to contact our lawyer. If anything happened and we did nothing we wouldn't be able to live with ourselves. Her ex best friend came to visit us today and told us she doesn't care if the ex finds out who told us about the site. She is scared for our Sd as well.
It is hard to believe that anyone would subject their child to such carp. It is bad enough that she lacks respect for herself but what about her daugther.
Thanks for everyone advice.
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