Step Talk

I would just explain to her that you are flatered, but that BM would probably not appreciate it or you could tell her that if her BM says it is OK, then she can.....takes the pressure off you and outs it on BM.

I had the exact situation except Skids (5 & 7 at the time) wanted to call me mom after they came to live with us. I tried to remain respectful to BM even though she respected no one not even herself. I handled this by telling them they could call me Ms. FirstName. For me it was more of a respect thing. Some agree with it some don't, bottom line is...it has worked for the past 5 years with no problems. Occasionally they call me mom, but they are older now and I don't push the envelope as much.

Oh I am so sorry, that I forgot to send you well wishes. Congrats! I hope that you have more sunshine that clouds as you travel this new path.

Step Mother's Motto this week is:

You don't have to LOVE me, you don't even have to LIKE me... But you will RESPECT me.

Congratulations!!
My skds have always called me by my first name, per my request.

My SS calls me by my first name and then sometimes mama(insert my name). Now at his request he has told me that it was great with him if I called him son. He was talking shower and called my name and I said yeah biscuit(his nickname dad gave him) he replied with Son and I said what he said that is what you can call me and then said that was all he wanted and went about showering! cracks me up. He still reminds me about every 2 weeks or so to not forget what he told me I could call him.

Congrats on your wedding and marriage!

In terms of the "what do you call me thing" I let the kids decide what they are comfortable with. They've called me my first name, Mama M and Mom. I've told them they can call me whatever they like so long as it's respectful. I figure its about what works for them, not BM. (although BM called them out and made them feel horrible for calling me mom, but then that's her issue, not theirs)

I had step parents and from time to time would "try" mom or dad but it never seemed to fit. My kids also call their SM "mom" occassionally but again, it doesn't bother me because they know and I know that I'm the mom. I just try not to let all the complicated nature of the step parent thing get in the way of the kids trying to sort it out on their own.

for all the advice. I dont always have alot of time to log on and reply as much as id like too. Working 2 jobs, home, skids etc makes it tough.

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

I would just let the kids decide what to call you, as long as it is nice! Hope you have a lifetime of love together

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin