Step Talk

how u feel

i totally understand he never used to see it as a problem i was just not confertable with his kids sleeping in my bed either very frustrating. and this kid was 6. its bad enoguh having to share a bed with one person let alone 2

i felt as thought becuase we never had any privacy all day all night while skids where there at least our bed should be private. Ya know?

so i can totally relate to ya honey but im glad im free

life is a box of choclates you never know what your going to get (i always pick the coffe of the box what about you )

BF has THREE skids and the youngest SS who was three at the time had a BAD habit of crawling into bed with us EVERY NIGHT of the weekends that he was over (which was EVERY weekend at the time; gawd i don't know how i survived it)

SS is:

1. a chronic bedwetter (he is almost 6 now and wets the bed every night; BF even told me not to put a nighttime diaper on him too many hours before he went to bed b/c he will start wetting it!!! THIS IS LAZINESS of SS's part PURE and SIMPLE)

2. a "bouncer" he bounces violently in bed and rocks himself to sleep. SO SS would continually bounce and rock in our bed for 30 minutes straight, then wake up again b/c BF would nudge him and the bouncing would start all over again!!

BF was VERY angry with me b/c I said this is NOT a good idea to let skids sleep in your bed. I tried reasoning with him that it is NOT good for either the adult or the child's sleep patterns and actually DEPRIVES everyone of a good night's sleep. It's bad enough that BF snores quite a bit!

BF was ready to start WWIII with me over this! He also had a BAD habit of letting SD (about 6 at the time) start sleeping in our bed then move her to her own bed in her own room!!!

I finally put my foot down and literally slept on the sofa until he got the message!! Apparently his desire to "snuggle" with me overpowered his need to have these hellions jump in bed with us!

it would have been that easy for me

he can cuddle me any night but not his precious boys lol

im so glad im free

sorry no mean to rub it in i feel about 10 stone lighter tho nw i dont have to worry all the tiem about the next blow out

the whole your so selfish shite along iwth why cant u just make taht little sacrafise blah blah blah so dont miss it

I have the same problem with my husband. First it was SD10! We got married when she was 8, and he was still letting her "sneak into bed" with us at 9 and 10. The problem was, he sleeps so hard that he didn't have the resistance to tell her no. As long as she could keep under his radar she would get away with it. On the other hand, I am a light sleeper and it would wake me up every time she came in there. We got in a HUGE fight about it one night because I was going to sleep on the couch and he saw that as some sort of betrayal. He wanted me to stay in bed with both of them and be uncomfortable. I don't think so! Anyway, I know where you're coming from but I don't know the solution.

Now my husband does the same thing with our BD (almost 5). He lets her crawl into bed with him at night (he goes to bed before I do). So I have to get her out of our bed and put her into her own bed every night. But I do it. I think you need to do the same. If your husband objects, let him go sleep in the little girl's bed!

every nite...never has slept in her own bed by herself...and shes 3

THANK GOD FH got her own bed as soon as she grew out of the crib. he slept on the couch the whole first year of her life bc SHE slept in his bed w BM. Sd sleeps FINE at our house, its just another way for BM to CODDLE, SPOIL and BABY her to the point where she will probably NEVER be able to function liek a normal kid, let alone adult. BARF.

if ur FH is letting FSD sleep in bed against your wishes, i would be so mad. when will YOUR feelings ever come first w him??

dont feel bad for complaining...u have a rite to and thats why we're here.

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

it took a while. it wasn't a one time thing. YES and i have accused of being SELFISH! The old "we see each other every night when we come home from work, but I only see the skids on the weekends; we have ENOUGH couple time together" chestnut.

It took about 4 tantrums on my part along with lots of trying to reason with him.

I'm thinking you were born in 1988?? LOL my YOUNGEST bio son was born in 1987. I am 9 years older than BF and 12 years older than the BM (giant toddler driving a saturn) My bio children are grown and off on their own. WHAT EVER possessed me to start all over again!??

I think the only solution is to keep pushing back; you will have a feel for how hard or softly you can push back, but keep setting boundaries out further and further. Do research on the web showing how communal sleeping is not what it's cracked up to be, etc. Maybe your FH will accept this. I know my BF will NOT accept hardly anything on the web and has told me that he will NOT follow "crayon's book of parenting!"

It's going to be an uphill climb so fasten your seatbelts. I sincerely hope you are going after CS from the BM if you are the CP!!!

Things need to CHANGE!

88 lol only a Baby but im a free baby now hahahaha its so great