Step Talk

I got home and SD11 hadn't done her chore yet again. This is the 6th time in two weeks she's been in trouble for it. She was also on restriction with no electronics (TV, Games, Radio, etc..) and she was watching TV. I chewed her out.

DH came home 3 minutes after me and backed me up. Then I went in the living room and SD12 had been messing with the Chihuahua's again. They aren't allowed to touch the Chihuahua's after they hurt them a few different times. So I chewed her out too.

Then she opened that mouth and said I treat the Chihuahua's better than her. (Damn right I do) I started to say something and DH stopped me and called SD12 in the room telling her she needed to hear it too. Oh and they added that I'm mean to them too.

I told them that the chihuahuas had never hit me, could they say that? The chihuahuas show me love, do they? The chihuahuas respect me, do they? I went on and on. I reminded them that when they first moved in I was very sweet to them. I did things for them and with them. That for five years before they moved in I worried, loved, cried and tried to do anything for them I could. And that since they had moved in they had treated me worse than a piece of crap on the bottom of their shoe. That its a two way street and for 5 1/2 years I've given them all of me, all my blood, sweat, and tears and nothing comes back the other way.

I told them that a family is also like a scale. With them on one side and DH and I on the other. That they expect me to be nice to them, give them things, take them places, do things for them and in return they think they can be nasty, rude, hateful, disrespectful, and just plain mean. I asked them if they thought that sounded balanced to them. I told them that DH and I had talked about it a week ago and what they see as me being mean is me doing to them what they do to me. I told them I've wasted to much of my love and concern on them and I wasn't doing it anymore that my "give and damn is busted".

I told them if they ever expected to see the "nice me" again then they needed to do their part too. The scales got to balance out. Then we talked about them not doing what I tell them to. How I can repeat something 3 or 4 times and they won't even listen till I start screaming and that had to stop too.

And the last thing we talked about was about DH and I and them trying to come between us. I told them that a marriage is more than a contract with the law that it's a contract with God. That in the eyes of God, when DH and I married we became one in his eyes. That that was the choice of DH and I, that when they married it didn't matter what their parents thought, that it was their choice. And that when DH and I married we made our choice. We chose to be one, not four. That our contract was with God not with them and I was tired of them blaming their bad behavior on Dh and I marrying without their permission, that we had God's permission. Oh and not to mention that using that as an excuse for OVER 5 years didn't hold water.

I've had it and I'm not trying anymore and I'm not taking it anymore either.