Step Talk

I pick up their shoes that are left out, and their clothes or toys and put them in their rooms. I shut the doors to their rooms a for a FEW days it is as if they do not exist! I do this immediately after they leave...

her bath stuff gets put away and her potty seat does too...if it were left out it would be a constant reminder of all the drama we go thru. FH even takes her booster seat out the car and puts it in garage. its just like why should all that stuff be out when shes only here 4 days a month? plus i hate clutter. plus i hate sharing a bathroom w kids...any kids. i want a bigger house w a private bath for us in my next life...

"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin

Yep I do that, but with my baby on the way soon I'm sure it will just be kid mayhem for a looong time

~ Remember it's your life too ~

I do the same thing. Clean up the huge mess left behind, and then close the skids bedroom doors, and they stayed closed until their next visit. It's a nice relief to close that door and know that the rest of the week SHOULD be quite peaceful. Now, if only there were a way to shut off the BM!

I just LOVE Tuesdays mornings at 8am in the Fall! That's when the last SD gets on the bus for school and they go back to BMs house (every-other week until that Friday and then every-other week until that Sunday at noon) But until then, Tuesdays are my big cleaning day- and I LOVE IT!

Now that they are older, Tuesdays mornings had been designated as "cleanup day"- no child leaves the house until their bedrooms, their bathrooms, their "lounge" the playroom, and all common areas of the house are CLEAN, and their personal items are put away. And if they do leave something out, depending on my mood, I'll do one of two things:
*toss it into their room and shut the door
*toss it into a special bag which has 'unclaimed' things in it
(some of these items have been unclaimed for years- that's how
much crap these kids have!)
*plus, they are not allowed to go out the following weekend!

Because we have a bigger house, which is a bit of a showhome, I refuse to have it look so pretty on the outside and look like a pigsty once you walk inside. And since I'm the once who is here all the time- I have to look at it all the time, so they have to live by my rules on this one! And since I like my home clean, darn it, they're going to keep it clean.

It used to be quite a battle when they were younger, but now that they're older, they know I'm serious, and if they don't want to have their stuff go 'missing' on a Tuesday when they're at school, they know to put it away before they leave!

Oh, they can be taught!

Besides, I firmly believe that people (kids and adults) do not thrive in clutter and chaos. Could you imagine what a house would look like with 7 people living with it if they all just tossed everything around and didn't give a darn about where it went?!

I shudder to think!

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

don't have doors. . . yet (b/c all our $$ goes to CS) surprise surprise but when we do get doors, they WILL be closed when they are gone, i can guarantee you that!

Could you imagine what a house would look like with 7 people living with it if they all just tossed everything around and didn't give a darn about where it went?!

make it 5 people and you have perfectly described BM and her boyfriend's rented double wide.

I used to do the same thing when the skids would visit.....HAHAHA

i do that too! i organize and put all her toys away in a corner in the living room, do her dirty laundry from the weekend and put it in a duffel bag in the corner with the toys, wash and put away all the "kid dishes," etc...and try to forget the drama for another couple of weeks. it's a very cleansing time! lol.

I don't care if it's an tiny apartment, a small row home, a double-wide, or a McMansion- I just don't think there's any excuse for living in filth.

When I was married to my first husband, we were dirt poor. I mean, we had to decide whether or not to put $10 of gas in the car or eat!
(Luckily, we bummed some meals off his parents, but it was that bad!).

We lived in a shoebox of a row home that his parents lent us (rent-free) because we couldn't afford anything else, and I couldn't work at the time because I had to take care of my disabled infant son.

But even though we literally had next to nothing, my home was never dirty. I always made sure it was clean on the inside. I decorated the picture window the best I could for the holidays by borrowing things from relatives. The little patch of grass we had out front looked nice and trimmed, and that there was never any trash on the sidewalk.

Having no money doesn't mean you automatically lose all sense of self-respect, does it? I don't think so!

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

they actually have LOTS of money, with BM's plum gov't job and her guaranteed raises plus benefits, plus BF's 12K a year and HER BF's salary, why oldest SS almost 12, stepped out at 1 pm on saturday IN A ROBE living a LIFE OF LEISURE in their filthy abode. He was watching movies in his bed; something that would NEVER be allowed by us. We get the kids up, give them breakfast, get them cleaned up, dressed and it's out to do chores!!!

I clean, straighten, strip the beds and remove all trace. I DARE CSI to find a single clue.

Then I heave a big sigh and relax.

Being my husbands third wife does not make me third rate. It just means he is a slow learner

i have a nosepicking/wiping SS. he never washes his hands, pees all over the bathroom seat and floor, he smells like a wet dog and never brushes his teeth, hair or showers. when he leaves, his dad drives him home and is gone for a few hours. i lysol and disinfect everything i think he MIGHT have touched. i strip the bedding and get ready to do laundry. i vacuum, dust, pet my poor cats (who can't stand him at times) and reassure them we have another two weeks. once i'm done my 'ritual' i sit there with a drink and wonder why i do this and if there is something seriously wrong with me? ha ha. either way, i'm VERY happy to hear i'm not the only one.

Just trying to be a Stepmom without getting Stepped On.

SS 5 1/2 crapping and not flushing, wiping or washing hands. I put an end to THAT! He also pees all over the toilet seat. sometimes i think BM tells him it's ok to do so at my house!!!! He is a bed wetter and smells like urine quite frequently. He's about the size of a 7 or 8 year old (BM is super tall and big; BF is solidly built like a pro-wrestler)