That BF and I had agreed to last July when BM and skids conspired to make a phoney child abuse charge against us. This is very symbolic b/c I received about 2 nano seconds of support from BF with the new house rules. I honestly thought we were making progress, until skids had a major fit b/c we made them eat meatloaf and "wouldn't come" any more. IN fact youngest SS 5 (now 5 1/2) specifically said that he would come over ONLY IF WE DIDN'T SERVE MEATLOAF anymore!!!
Plus the fact that BF is chasing his tail by playing into BM's hands; letting the skids "choose" to come over or not willy nilly whenever the mood strikes them. I feel as though I"m running an open door hotel with an on-call pager!!
He refuses to see the benefits of enforcing his EOW schedule!!
So now BF is back to parenting by guilt and catering to "Junior's" every need as a disneyland dad 
The removing of the parental control (which BF requested me to do b/c he can never remember the code) is a big sign of my disengagement. It shows that BF does not care what, in this case, SS 5 1/2 watches on TV. I've seen him watch Yugi-OH and other inappropriate cartoons for his age, but if BF doesn't give two hoots than neither do I.
Good luck this weekend
Good luck this weekend Crayon. I know I am dreading the weekend... as I am sure you are too.
THANKS!
I'll be with all of you in spirit; in fact, I was thinking of all of you last weekend.
crayon, your skids
are holding their own father 'hostage' by using their visitation as a weapon. this is not only wrong, it is sickening. it's sickening that a child is learning such malicious manipulative practices so early to get what they want. but what is even more sad, is the fact that these disneyland dads fall for it every time. i am sorry that you have to stand by and witness this. i am in the same boat. my SS12 controls everything and all he has to do is 'pout' and make it known he won't come here if..... and he gets his way.
we are creating monsters. all adults involved should take control of the situation and remind their kids that yes, they have small choices right now eg. peanut butter toast or pancakes for breakfast? but they DON'T get to make choices that affect the family in a negative way yet benefit them short-term. this kind of situation reflects as you put it, the overwhelming amount of 'guilt' that these parents have and the fact that yes, their kids do feel this guilt and use it to their advantage. shame on everyone. except you and other stepparents that refuse to fall victim to this destructive little cat and mouse game going on.
i wish counselling was mandatory when parents of kids split. i really wish that.
Just trying to be a Stepmom without getting Stepped On.
I am with you
I came home from visiting my parents to find my house a total disaster! Food spilled on chairs that no one is supposed to eat on etc. I have been pitching one HUGE fit and told DH that he and the children need to move out. I am done. Done being taken advantage of. Done paying all the bills since both BM and DH are sorry ass parents. DONE! Sorry for the bit of vent but I know how you feel. I am disengaging in some things and putting my foot up everyones butts in others. I am taking control of my house again!
"GO BACK TO YOUR BRIDGE YOU EVIL TROLL. YOU HAVE NO POWERS HERE"
I say...
START BAKING THAT MEATLOAF!!!
Post new comment