Step Talk

Yeah.. not let her in.

Seriously.. I get that knot when my dh's ex CALLS the house.. forget coming inside (she isnt allowed after she assaulted me)..

Good luck.. you are a better person than me. Perhaps throwing up just before she gets there.. OR a big glass of wine or some adult beverage prior to her ringing your door bell (dont forget the mints after!!)

I wish I had some good advice for you, but just reading about this makes me want to go take a shower.

♥ Georgia, the un-stepmom ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

To get rid of that sinking feeling until she actually shows up and the visitation begins. Just try to remain calm, act as you normally would in your home and remember just how gracious you are being. Your DH owes you big time!

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

BM is at and in our house more then I like. She's crossed the lines on several occasions and I had to set her straight. I'm pretty sure she resents me for not allowing her to use SD's key to come over when we are not there. How on earth she could think that was okay is beyond my comprehension. With that said, I'm fine with her coming by and coming in, but I don't want her to come hang out in our house. Why am I fine with this? Because I think it builds good relations for all involved in this crazy stepfamily world, especially good for SD. She has a house not that far away and even if she didn't why would she want to hang in our house. Wouldn't she prefer some one-on-one time with her daughter? Sorry I was ranting.

On one hand by letting her in your house, it makes things seem more stable for your SS. On the other hand if your BM is guilty of PAS or other shenanigans then say NO and then pick a designated place to meet her with SS. It all depends on your BM, what kind of person she is and how she gets along with you and your H. Does she want to hang out at your house? As stated that doesn't work for me, but that's just me. You shouldn't have to suggest this but may have to. Suggest some activities away from your home for her and SS. Is there a park they could go to, museum, a science center, bowling etc etc.

but i would say no...i understand that kids need stability but these situations dont lend themselves to that completely...kids go back and forth all the time and while it is not ideal, its reality and it happens and it works. but i dont know the whole situation and im guessing theres more here so i would agree w the others...get drunk first bc i cant handle when she even texts and she will NEVER EVEN come NEAR our house again so cheers to u for putting yr stepkids needs b4 yr own!

Hang lots of garlic and hang a huge cross nearby. Keep some wooden stakes around in case she gets out of hand

You will do fine. Just remember it is your home court advantage.

"GO BACK TO YOUR BRIDGE YOU EVIL TROLL. YOU HAVE NO POWERS HERE"

Im sure our situations are different but I could never ever imagine letting her in my house, its my house, just like I would never go in to hers. you are definatly a bigger person them me! Good Luck!