???? I saw that in your other post.

How did they manage to not have a Custody Order but have the Child Support? Were they just dating and never married?

I know that my DH has custody of SS10 and he wasn't married to the BM. He went to court for it though, and got it.

Got it.

Well, if there's no legal custody arrangements, BEFORE your husband takes his daughter FULL TIME, he really needs to get the arrangements in writing. I mean, if he's going to do this, and stabalize his daughter into a new life, he should do right by that and get the mother to agree to it in writing. And get the child support ended in that as well.

Yep, it's a pain in the ass to go to court, but think of the future issues that could occur if he doesn't. The mom has all the balls in her court, your husband even after taking his daughter does not. Possession is NOT 9/10ths of the law when it comes to kids.

If it is written in the CS papers that BM has custodial custody then that is what the courts will follow. If SD will be coming to live with you then cover your hiney and get it changed legally. If BM agrees then all you have to do is write it up, both parents sign it then file it with the courts. many times it doesn't even need a hearing in front of a judge when you do it this way.

If two people aren't married, the mother is always assumed to be the custodial parent unless and until the father gets his legal rights in a court order.

Even if BM agrees, get it in writing. Before DH and BM had a CO, they had been in mediation and we would have SS week on week off during winter and summer vacation. We would not pay CS during the weeks we had him. Once we went through the courts, the week on week off visits during summer were not specified. BM graciously said we could have him over winter break and after having him almost three weeks straight because she kept having things come up, she asked DH for her CS. He said he wasnt paying her bc the previous agreement had said he would not pay CS when SS spent more then 4 days with us in the same week. Well BM said that is not in the current CO so tough shit. Basically, I spent my entire winter vacation playing sitter for BM and then had to pay HER for the priviledge of watching her child. GET IT IN WRITING!

Well it kinda of depends on the state your in and sticking to your guns. Before Child support was determined in court making her the legal residence for the kids it would be a cival matter.
I explained to my husband MANY times when she demanded the kids back NOW and threatens to call the cops. We could be having dinner and not due to have the kids to her for 3 more hours she would just DEMAND bring them now! I tried to get him to have her call the cops and produce the custody and visitation papers. Show the officer birth certificates, tell him have a nice nite, and tell her we will bring them to her in 3 hours as agreed in TXT messages earlier. It would be a civial matter bc its obvisouly not a kidnapping. OF course He'd just tell them get in the truck, your mom wants you home.
After child support was figured NOW its up to him to fight in court for visitation. In IL if he doesn't have an income they can base child support on my income and take it from MY paycheck. IF that happens I'm walking from child support across the hall to file for divorce. Then Walking back to child support to hand them my court date for divorce. 100% promise that!

You asked the question of why he's paying child support, and then answered your own question in your next post. So, I don't exactly understand you asking the question if you already knew why. Aside from that, he's paying because the kid is his and couldn't plan her next meal based on what and when he decided to provide in the way of support

It doesn't take a court order to determine the custodial parent. Her mother is the custodial parent because she lives with her mother. As was explained, he will have to go to court for his role to be legally determined and documented. If he wants custody, he cannot just decide to keep the child without her mother's permission. He will have to go to court to become the custodial parent. This doesn't have to happen for him to be financially responsible for the child. It's what he should have been doing without her mother having to force him.

My fiancee and drug-addict baby momma have NO LEGAL DOCUMENTS from ANY court stating who the custodial parent is of the kid!!!!!!!!!!!

They were never married, they split when the kid was 2. He just 'took' the kid and basically told her he had a court order for temporary custody (that was a lie). Either way, she never even tried once to get that kid back. (she may be a drug addict but she's no dummy, kid is a nightmare)

My question then becomes, what if she decides to 'clean up' someday and want to come claim her spawn....with no documentation of any kind,my guess is that a court would allow her to take him.

Obviously there's no child support being paid, she's on welfare to the best of our knowledge. I've told dad a million times he needs legal documentation for this kid, he says 'no she's never gonna come try to take him and if she does nobody would give him to her'....yeah RIGHT, he obviously has no idea the weight that just being a biological mother has on the court system......

thoughts???

By letting the daughter stay with Mom all those years the mother has defacto custody although I suppose there would be a problem finding him guilty of criminal violation of a custody order that doesn't exist.

The easiest thing to do is for both parents to sign an agreement as to where the kid will live and what, if any, support is to be paid. (This is a good time to bribe Mom by saying if the kid lives with Dad Mom won't have to pay). Then if Mom won't sign then Dad knows she's going to fight and he might as well file for custody and have it out.