Use whatever name you want, BUT make it clear to teachers and doctors that you are not the stepkid's mother.

I'd hyphenate. Or start using your initial. In my case if she had been Susan Jones, I'd be Susan B. Jones. But I think I'd be more likely to go with Susan Jones-Smith, unless you have a name that would sound wierd.

As far as the ex losing the right to use his last name if they divorce...not necessarily. If my spouse and I divorced, I'd keep the last name unless I remarried, because that is my children's last name. If I remarried, I would still keep my children's last name, and I would hyphenate, especially since I own my own business and I don't want to change my name.

I would keep my last name! Why not? More power to u girl for keeping it, after all it's you're and who the hell said we women have to give up our last names anyways?? And I def wouldn't switch to his if his ex wife once had the same title!! Sick !! It would but me way too much cause she's a snatchbox.

I sure wouldn't take the chance of being confused with her or mistaken as her. Men by the same name have that problem sometimes. A junior gets stuck with his father's bill from years before, or the senior gets billed for something that junior purchased. Seniors and juniors get mixed up in almost all situations. Anyone can call the house and ask for John Somebody, and they always have to ask questions to determine which John Somebody they're calling. Would you want to go through any of that? Imagine being mistaken for her concerning her credit card bill(s) or something she did while they were married. Imagine also being mistaken for her concerning things she does right now. Previous addresses and former husbands remain a matter of record.

Listening to people who imagine laws, situations, and circumstances can be misleading or even dangerous in some cases. There is no one who ever lost the right to use their husband's last name just because they divorced. It would have had to be specifically requested by the husband and specifically written in the decree, which was extremely rare. There was, at one time, an archaic clause or provision of the divorce decree where the woman earned the right to restore her name (restoration of her name or something like that) to her maiden name if she so chose, but there has never been any law or even any understanding or even any expectation that a woman "loses the right" to use her married name after a divorce. It has only been the past 20 or so years that hyphenating became common consideration and practice. Long before that, the majority of women kept their married name and didn't change it unless they married again. Not only does the woman remain Jane Him, but she also remains Mrs. Jane Him. Although the title Ms. is an ancient form of address, it became common usage around the middle of the 20th century and designated as always proper since you cannot always know for certain upon meeting if a woman is married or not. It became widespread as it became the preferred title of address among divorced women. They were no longer married obviously, and it certainly didn't make sense to go back to being called Miss. And, Ms. is applicable whether she reverted back to using her maiden name or stayed with her married name.

For my daughter's sake, I kept my married name and went back to my maiden name when she turned 18. I changed to my second husband's name when I married again. There was probably a one in a hundred million chance that either of my husbands would marry a woman with my same name. Thank goodness my name is very unique, or I should say "was" very unique, as it is much more commonly used since 1980 than ever it was before that. If I had your problem though, there is no way I would take my husband's name, not even to hyphenate it. I'd probably ask him to take my name. LOL (yes, that is also possible)

SO has the annoying habit to call his daughter SD7 with her first and last name in a very cheeeeewwwwwy way to make it sound very, very SPECIAL, like "Jessieee Milllllllllleeeeeeerrrr "(=fake name), so it sounds like the whole team daddy -daughter belonging family thing: Milllleeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr!!!!!!!. I don't know what I would do if we would get married, I didn't give that any thought because it is not on the agenda right now.I think I would need to keep my ex name because it's also my childrens last name.I think I will also copy his weird habit of calling SD the first and lst name and try to apply that to my kids- since I have three it will probably very annoying though.....hehehe, plus we have a long German name and it will sound more like "Walter Schwabbelbabbelmaxxxxx" (fake name:))...maybe SO realises that we are special, too:))))))

When he proposes then you can worry about this...SMDH

I would keep my own last name -- just because it would be hard, legally, to be differentiated from the ex. Who knows what can come back up from the past and if you could potentially become her.

I'd just keep my last name.

see, this is the problem with having such a common name!!!

Keep your own name. Otherwise it's like you are an attempt to replace her..mmm... recreate her. I hope you don't look like her.

The main reason I would keep my own name in such a situation is you never know how BSC the ex might get. She might have taken her married name now but she might have old DL, SS card, and whatever else papers that other people will think she is the current and legal wife.

She could wreak some havoc on you legally and financially by posing as you, and yes she might end up in jail or prison or something but in the meantime your life could be wrecked.

Get HIM to take your last name.