Step Talk

My kids hate picking up poop - dog or cat. This is one of our punishments. Some of my mom's good one's were scrubbing out trash cans, scrubbing floors with a toothbrush - don't forget the corners, and being grounded to our room - no TV, phone, video games, etc., picking weeds by hand in the yard or garden, sorting the pile of socks that don't have a mate, scrubbing out litter box. Make him listen to music he hates - like opera. My kids consider having to watch PDA (between me adn BF)a punishment. I come from a huge family (19 kids) so my mom got pretty creative with her punishments. I wish I could call her for some more but we lost her a couple of years ago.

I hope some of this helps.

Geez L&T...I would think you must be livid!! If I ever found out SS told lies about us to get what he wanted he wouldn't be coming back here for sometime I'd think.

My own son picks up dog crap everyday as a chore...so that wouldn't be a punishment to him, but take away that PC and boy does that make them pull their head out of their you know what!!

I would just treat him with no trust and no lead. Teach him that while he tells lies he has no freedom, no treats and no trust. He will now have to earn all that back. I am sorry you had to go through this, I can think of nothing worse than being accused of child abuse when you have done nothing but love them..bloody kids, they do the stupidest things sometimes

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*

I know exactly what you are feeling. There is nothing like a lying child trying to destroy your life and the idiots that play into the lie. Ummmm being kicked in the head would leave a mark!!! DUH

I can't blame you for being angry but keep a cool head about you. You have nothing to hide. Don't give that child ANY mercy. Remember this you don't have to do anything legally but keep a roof over a childs head, food to eat, clothes to wear, and an education. An empty room with no TV, oatmeal for dinner evernight (plain and nutricious), and clothes can be bought from Goodwill. No electronics, TV, NOTHING!

"Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt"

I would make him volunteer at a soup kitchen or shelter for kids. Of course, someone has to go with him, BUT it would be good for him to see where he would have ended up if the DHS worker had believed him. It's a good teaching moment. I would also do the counseling thing. I don't know your story, but obviously this kid has a reason for doing this, especially since you said that he has done it before. Maybe a psychological evaluation would help.

During all my crap w/SD16, at one point, I took EVERYTHING out of her room and she stayed in a room with a mattress on the floor and empty furniture and 4 walls for 2 wks. She finally decided it was better to follow our rules instead of following her own stubborn mind. It worked for a while.

Good Luck

FSS seems to think if he says things like "I stuck his head in a toilet" he'll get me in trouble. Let CPS come on over, I'll let them know EVERYTHING else that his BM does and how spoiled he is. Don't let this kid bring you down! It's complete bullcrap what these spoiled brats can get away with today. If FSS continues to lie, he's not welcome here anymore, even my fiancee agreed with that, especially when the lies are hurting others and can get them in trouble.

Skids and BM turned me in for child abuse once after SKid kicked the bed leaving a NASTY! bruise. It took 2 months for the investigation before they finally decided I didn't do anything!! FCS called and interviewed people I work with, relatives, friends, and my exboss from when I was a school bus driver. It's been three years since then and the kid still blaims me!!

She said "you spanked me" Yeah I spanked her all right! that little shit was cursing me and throwing large objects at my head. My DH was standing right there and said spank her, that she needed to learn to mind. I layed her across the bed and with a open hand I popped her butt twice through JEANS! She got up pissed and hauled off and kicked the bed while trying to kick me!

As for punishment in our house, here's a short list:
1. Pick up 100 pinecones (we only have 5 pinetrees on 7 acres)
2. No electronics (computer, TV, phone, radio, xbox, playstation, nintendo)
3. Extra chore for a week
4. cleaning up dog poop
5. walking the driveway; 10 loops (it's a lllooonngggg driveway up a steap hill)
6. writing sentences (really long sentences, usually around 200 to 500 0f them)
7. copying chapters out of the Bible
8. Trash detail (walking the neighborhood and picking up litter everyday for a week, neighbors love this one)
9. standing on a phonebook in the middle of the floor for 30 minutes (no sitting, bending, talking, nothing, they REALLY hate this one)
10. my husband spanks them and they get another punishment off the list also

Don't fear the thorns among the Roses, but be greatful for the Roses among the thorns

Your SS8 is out of control.

I'm not a corporal punishment type of girl. But I do believe in punishments that fit the crime. If he lied about DH , DH really needs to be the one that insures that SS8 understands how wrong this is. He needs to relay to him how hurt he is and what the ramifications would have been if people would have believed his lies.

Little liars need to be called out everytime and they need to feel the burning embarassment turn their little faces red. I say that your SS needs to personally go up to the daycare providers and apologize for the lie he told. He needs to feel guilty.

Also, I have a "Young Marines" chapter in my town that is pretty inexpensive. Maybe check out the website and see if this would help? Maybe there is one located near you? My BS12 is also very spoiled and a bit on the lazy side so he's signed up for this summer. I think it's a great program and a great outlet for those not so disciplined little devils.

http://www.youngmarines.com/

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain."

Hey girl! You know I have no advice for ya because we are floating in the same boat. I have some thoughts, but Child Services has already paid you a visit, so we dont want to make that happen again!! hahaha.... Just know that if you need anything, you know where to find me. The kid does it for attention and probably wont let up. I think sometimes I wish DH would pack up and leave with SD but I know that isnt solving anything, except allowing the child to win. Have you considered some sort of boot camp for SS? I know your story too well and this child is hurting you and your entire family so much. Honey, you could lose all those kiddos because of his lies.

Anyway, like I said, not sure what to recommend.Cant be the pot calling the kettle black... Just know I love ya and you can call me anytime!! Hugs

Another good punishment is to have him cut the lawn no shorter than 2 inches with a pair of scissors, don't forget to give him a ruler for measuring the grass as he is cutting. I used to do this one with my 3 sons when they did something really bad.

I dont think even that would solve laughter's problem with that kiddo... although it would be pleasurable to watch him with the ruler!

"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."

What he needs is to learn is compassion. Obviously if he picked up on the BM's traits like this and she is out of the picture he was never given any compassion until he got to your house. Why is he trying to sabatogue it? Who knows... anger at you for giving him something his mother refused to... not wanting to rely on something and have it taken away... confusion on how to appropriately express his anger. Maybe you could contact the local pound, have him take care of dogs that have truely been beaten. See how eagerly they respond to just a little niceness. He can learn compassion by giving it to a wounded doggie and the doggie in return will shower him with affection. If he goes in with the wrong attitude the animal will feel it and will react accordingly. Cleaning dog runs is yucky, but it will serve a purpose.