How often do you have skids?
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DH and I have SD every other week for the full week and I am finding that it is just way too much. When we first got together, it was a couple days a week which I could tolerate just fine, but now it is full weeks at a time and I am just completely stressed out and don't know how I can deal with this. I want to get it down to every other weekend- any advice?
p.s. Please no comments about how taking a father away from his child is wrong, etc- they moved into my house and SD is very rude and disrespectful to me. I am sick of it.
I know where you are coming
I know where you are coming from! Boyfriend and his son (now 12) moved into my house 3 years ago and I am about at my wits end. At first, custody was split. Soon after moving in, it changed to where BM gets her son every other weekend and 3 weeks in summer (changed this year to 4 weeks in summer). I look forward to the weekends that he is gone to his mothers. Unfortunately, she is not REQUIRED to get him if she doesn't want to which happens to be the case this weekend. I always look forward to not having to deal with him much in the summertime. In addition to the 4 weeks at his mothers house, he will be gone to 3 different away from home summer camps for a week at a time and another week with his grandmother. I can't even begin to tell you how much I am looking forward to this summer! He has said he'd rather live with his mother because she lets him do whatever he wants and he has no rules. That would suit me just fine. Ironically, I don't think she wants him to live with her.
I have my SD 6 days a week..
I have my SD 6 days a week.. and its just me her and my son ALL day long.. I also wish she just came on the weekends.. but if the other parent don't want the kid what can you do
We have skids every other
We have skids every other week just like you. We have my Bios full time. 4 teenage boys. Lately it has become completely overwhelming. The amount of food they eat, the messes they make, the laundry, just having that many bodies in one tiny house. I feel for you.
Too much
Too much
24/7 -- 365 I think that you
24/7 -- 365
I think that you are just going to have to tell your hubby how you feel. That you really aren't prepared for this and when you got together this living arrangement wasn't what you had. That it is too much for you. Maybe suggest that he is the one to take care of her and not you.
24/7 365 we have the skids,
24/7 365 we have the skids, 50% of the time with my bios
Thank you all! I was just
Thank you all! I was just curious to see what other custody arrangements are and if the 50/50 thing is very common or not. I feel like she is ALWAYS there. The weeks we have her just DRAG & then the weeks she is gone fly by and before I know it, she is back like a disease. I will definitely have to have a talk with DH but I don't know how to approach it without him getting defensive like he does whenever I mention his little princess. I honestly just feel like SD's mom is the one who wanted her (DH was not married to the mother, she basically got pregnant to try & trap him &- surprise- that didn't work) so she should be the one to take care of her. Also, I do not even believe she is really his child. I don't know for sure, but she looks nothing like him & if you knew the mother, you would question who the kid's father is too lol. I've been asking him to get a paternity test just to be sure the child we are taking care of is actually his but he refuses!
Are you willing to divorce
Are you willing to divorce over this? This may be a deal breaker issue for your husband.
We have SS every Tues & Weds
We have SS every Tues & Weds and every other w/kend.........oh and also every single school holiday unless we can arrange some sort of club/ activity in the day then golden uterus is prepared to pick him up in the afternoon on what would usually be her days anyway.The reason being not because she works full time but because -and I quote "she wouldn't get any time to herself otherwise"! :sick:
24/7 which is why i have a
24/7 which is why i have a bleeding ulcer
Has anyone succeeded in
Has anyone succeeded in reducing the amount of time the skids are in your home? I am telling you.. I am about ready to pull my hair out.. :O
We have full custody of them!
We have full custody of them! so 24-7\365. Oh wait Mommy Dearest aka birth mom gets them a whooping 50 days a year worth of summer breaks, and alternating Christmas\Thanksgiving breaks. HA! Good luck!
Oh gosh, I guess I should be
Oh gosh, I guess I should be happy we don’t have full custody then! DH and BM are supposed to have joint custody (week on, week off), but that is increased from what it was when we got together and I want it back the old way! I would be perfectly fine with every other weekend- they could spend time together and do nothing but fun things, have no discipline or real parenting involved, and I could do my own thing. But her being there the full week is just draining me. It is more of an issue with the way DH treats me when she is around than it is with her personally (but don’t get me wrong, she is a total spoiled brat). As soon as she walks in the door, its all about her & he wants the weeks to be full of fun and he for some reason feels like he has to constantly entertain her. I get no time with my husband whatsoever. Then by the time SD is in bed, DH is so exhausted from following her around all day (she is 4, she doesn’t need to be followed around- he does this by choice) that he has no energy for anything else (i.e., his wife). I am just disgusted with it!