which was actually kind of nice
beside the annoyance of getting home and seeing "outback steakhouse" doggie bags in the fridge(why can't SD ever just make herself something at home, if nothing is made for her, she has to go out and spend $$- and this is at least the third time in 2 days she's gone out to eat, and it's about 30.00 each time, and she isn't paying.....)
besides that annoyance, H was gone to pick his boss up from the airport and then they went to the casino together- SS was up in his room playing xbox like always
and SD was gone somewhere.
I noticed my leggings and black hoodie were gone, of course, and she still has my black sweater and that purple shirt I saw her friend walk out with....
So I forced my son to eat a poptart(he won't eat much lately) and I ate some leftovers, and then we went upstairs.
The dr had prescribed me a new cream for my personal problem- supposed to be a 7 day thing, so I hope it will work, haven't felt any better yet, in fact this morning, I felt like the whole thing was turned inside out, but anyway
He said there were a few nuances in my blood tests, including, "elevated neurocils" and "monoketones" or something, but he had no name for what I had, and no real advice except to come back if things get worse. And I told him about the sweating at night- he said it's not to worry about for now, just probably part of the virus.
But I told H some things to make it sound more serious, and told him the dr said to relax and take it easy, and that I'll have more tests in a few days...not exactly true, but I know that I need to take it easy to get better, and I don't want those guys dumping all their BS all over me again.
The glands are still swollen, and there's still something wrong with my left tonsil.
A girl at work says she's getting sick with something that seems similar to what I had. I hope she'll be ok, and will try to get the boss to let her go home and sleep.
I started making things like pizza, microwave lasagna, etc, and just leaving them cold on the counter, so SS will eat them, instead of asking me to cook at a time which isn't convenient for me. For two nights it worked.
I came up with a list of things that would help me get better and give me a little break....
SD- don't ask me "come her for a second", if you want to talk to me, come to where I am.
don't bother me that "there's nothing to eat" make yourself something, leave me out of it
keep the tv volume at a reasonable level
if you eat, just throw the food in the garbage, and rinse off the dish
pick up after yourself
don't wake me up when i'm asleep unless it's an emergency, and don't ask me to be your alarm clock
SS- don't ask me to bring you back and forth from your mom's house, it's her job
don't ask me "what can I eat?" make yourself something, and then clean up after yourself
keep your tv volume and your voice down at night so i can sleep
don't leave your dirty clothes on the bathroom sink
don't bother me if you don't want to go to school, bother your dad about it, or just go to school
my son- just eat your food and eat your dinner at a reasonable time. don't keep saying you're not hungry, and then ask me to cook for you at bedtime.
do your homework, don't make me fight you over every single problem, taking two hours to do something that you're smart enough to do in five minutes
H- ask your kids to do some housework once in awhile- stop expecting everything to be done between the two of us. I think the whole reason I got sick is because you wore me out.
don't call me and ask me to pick up your kid- call his mom and ask her.
make sure he stays with his mom, and tell her she needs to do a lot more to take care of her responsibilities toward her kids, instead of dumping them on me.
Ok, so it's 11:20 in the morning, and I call home to ask the kids(who are on spring break)- if the cat has food and water....no one answers....lazy pigs. they're still in bed! SD planned all her classes so she wouldn't have to leave the house until noon, and she still isn't up! She has to stay up alone until 4 in the morning every night.
wanted to mention that she told me that she can't stop talking to that horrible cheating loser.....and the other night she took my car, and came back with the passenger seat leaned way back....how i hope they weren't having sex in my car!
she came in last night, late into our room, wearing my leggings as pants again...gross.
one nice thing is that i'm basically ignoring everything in the house and not complaining or dealing with any of it. as a result, H has been getting nicer...this morning when he left he kissed me on the cheek..funny how i think that's special. it used to be normal, everyday stuff.
in my first marriage, my ex would say "i love you" all the time, kisses and hugs were normal, happened all day, and he'd tell me "you're a beautiful woman"........now if anything half that nice happens, i feel like writing it in a blog..wow
Did you ever come to think
Did you ever come to think that your stress level has caused your immune system to breakdown.. that you are sick BECAUSE of that situation that you are in.
I had a job once that ran me ragged.. I was working 6 - 7 days a week for like 10+ hrs a day.. and this went on for months.. well.. during the MIDDLE OF THE SUMMER, I got tonsolittis.. and had a fever of over 103. They said that was unusal and that it was bc I was burning the candle at both ends.
I think so, definitely,
I think so, definitely, probably the same sort of situation you had-
when you can't rest and recuperate, and you get sick, it just keeps bringing you further down.
I do think this year has exhausted my entire system
Why don't you take all your
Why don't you take all your clothes away from her and tell her she can't wear them?
Seriously, that would so piss me off. How old was she when she started taking your clothes?
How old are these skids now? They sounds like my 10 year old SD.....actually, she sometimes attempts to do her own laundry, so maybe she's a few steps ahead of yours.
That would be the normal
That would be the normal thing to do, but my H is completely weird and he gets mad at me every time I try to do anything about the problem.
I did once take all of my favorite things out of the closet, and hid them, but she found them and then attempted to literally steal half of it(I found a bunch of my clothes hidden in a bag in her closet and locked in her car)- when I told H what she did, he said "sure"....
She's 18. I don't have any authority over her, and H won't allow me to have my own space or my own privacy, and he says "that's just the way she is" "that's just the way it is right now"
I wonder
If one day, you just grabbed a couple handfuls of your hair & screamed in frustration, would he get the clue? Hey, you'r eupset, right? That's just the way it is right now.
Honestly, I have no idea how you can stand it.
Hipi
When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
the weird thing is, everyone
the weird thing is, everyone else in the house is allowed to scream and yell. even H yells. but every time I yell, he acts like it's the end of the world and goes on and on about my "behavior"....the last time i yelled, he said "you just look like a mad woman right now"
he wants me to be soft spoken about everything.......and when i say that it bothers me the way SD screams and cries, he says "that's just the way she is"
I don't know how i stand it either, but I think physically, it's wearing me down. I am finally really sick and it seems like a result of all that's happened this year and that a person can only take so much.
I really think it is
I think it's effecting you in a physical way.
I used to take crap like that from everyone, but I went through a hard time when my ex & I broke it off. It wasn't just his retaliation, it was the fact that I needed support & had none whatsoever. It took a major toll on me & now I have very little patience & a bad temper.
Hipi
When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
f*** that
how about taking his clothes and letting homeless people wear them for a couple of days??
it is ridiculous that he lets this go on!!
that is a total slap on the face to you and your rights (as a wife and human being)
lock your door and do not give the H the key either!!
oooo I am so baaadd.
“You will never be on top of the world
if you try to carry it on your shoulders.”
I said the SAME thing to
I said the SAME thing to him!!!! I said "how would you like it if I just invited a couple of guys into your closet and said, take whatever you like?"
He actually told me that he wouldn't get upset and it would be ok with him.....right.
I know that I have rights- everyone in a house has a right to their own privacy and their own things, and I've pointed out that I am the only one out of the five who does not have their own closet and does not have anything of their own...I said "I just want you to admit that, even if you won't change it, I just want you to admit that that's my position." he said "that's just the way it is right now"
Hi Chava. Tonsils can be
Hi Chava. Tonsils can be KILLERS. I still have mine and have been horrendously sick at times with huge blisters on them, swollen glands, fever, etc. It was never strep, always a nasty virus. I know how painful it can be. I remember one time I was in so much pain I held an ice cube with a pair of tongs directly on one of my tonsils.
I'm pretty sure your irritation "down there" is from the antibiotic. But, I know you said your SD always had yeast infections? Do you think borrowing your leggings could have spread something like this? I know it's highly doubtful. BUT...I wonder if you tell her you had a yeast infection and the doctor said something about it being spread by clothing if she would stop borrowing your clothes? It's worth a shot. I mean if you said, "by the way, I have a yeast infection. The doctor said if anyone else wore my clothing, they'd catch it too." I'd love to see the look on her face.
Oh wow, it isn't as bad as
Oh wow, it isn't as bad as having to hold an ice cube to it- why didn't the doctor want you to have them taken out when it got to that point?
you know, I didn't think of that- that's pretty gross, but she does always have those things, and actually, I always find my clothes tried on and then not worn- what if she tried on a pair of my underwear, and put them back without washing???? So disgusting...
I am definitely going to tell her that the dr said my yeast is very contagious and that she'll get one too if she wears my stuff....thanks for the idea
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