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New here and concerned about my 10 year old SS

lilliebelle1's picture

Hello everyone! Im new here and Ive been researching all over the internet trying to figure out whats wrong with him. My stepson (10 years old now) was a toddler when his mom and my husband divorced. Ive been in his life since he was 3 and Ive always felt like he was mine. He was very mature for his age (called him a little old man) and had mannors and helped out when needed. For some strange and odd reason he started regressing back in '08. He has always had a speech problem but nothing serious however, it turned into BABY TALK! He talks like a baby and he is very immature. He isnt a bad child(quiet most of the time)but he does compete with my son (who is 9) and will get into fights with him. He is obese and very lazy but he loves to play sports when he has a "audience". Its like he is starving for attention yet he gets it all the time! His mom has physical custody but we get them alot. When he is at his moms, he is babied, sleeps with her, she dresses him and she bathes him. She does everything for him so when comes to our house he is treated like a 10 year old and he doesnt cope well here. I dont know if this is a behavior problem or what but Im tired of constantly correcting him. He also plays "ignorant" when given simple tasks. For example, the cereal bowls have been in the same spot for 6 years yet he will walk in the kitchen and say, "where are the bowls?" He will play this game until someone fixes it for him (its not me!). He also is clueless about everything! Its seems like he cant dress himself with an adult guideing him on what to do. He needs an adult telling him how to do EVERYTHING! Today he asked me, "do you want me to put my shoes on before I go outside" and for lunch "do you want me to put mayo on my bread"? Im very concerned about his maturity. My 9 year old acts so much older than him and I think thats why they dont get along well. He even laughs like a very yound girl and Ive wittness his mom talking baby talk to him. Its really getting under my skin bc she isnt allowing him to grow up!!!!!!!

My husband isnt doing much to help the situation bc he feels that he might hurt his spirit. I think he is starting to realize that something has to be done. Today, he got into a argument with my son and he stormed off to the middle of a corn field behind the house (we live in the country). He does this alot bc he knows someone will come and get him. This time my husband said, "if he walked out there then he can walk back". I was actually proud of him! An hour later he returned.

Here are the issues that we are dealing with:

-immaturity

-baby talk

-jealousy

-hot temper

-acts clueless when given simple tasks

-will not do anything on his own

-will not sleep by himself

-is always seeking attention

-says strange/odd things and has a gross potty mouth

I dont know if this is caused by his mother or behavior disorder. He has horrible corridination and runs like a small child (he takes baby strides. His memory is HORRIBLE and I find myself constantly repeating myself. My son has tourette syndrome with a co-disorder of ADHD. A fiends said that he might has ADD or ADHD but I just dont see it. Is anyone else in a similar situation? Just seeking advice bc Im at my witts end!!!!! Forgive me if I dont repost quickly to replies. I have 4 children in my care haha! Thank you so much!!!