I am totally CONFLICTED (hence the name). I am feeling things that I have never felt before and I don't know if it is weird or wrong or what, I don't know if it is jealously or insecurity, I am so totally conflicted right now.
My husband's ex-wife is getting married TODAY (of all days!).
We know that she is just marrying for money and the relationship will not last (they have not even known each other for 1 year).
I don't know why this bothers me but it does. Why would this bother me? I do sort of feel badly for her because she is marrying this guy for money and because she seems to want a normal life. She sees her ex and I and our relationship and other's relationships and I'm sure she wants the same. The things is IF she does get it she WILL screw it up. She had a wonderful man and a stable life right in front of her and she choose to throw it away and cheat and walk out. My husband even took her back several times but by the third round he'd had enough.
I don't know, does anyone have any input? Why is her getting married bothering me?
I am not sure
Are you worried about the new husband to be? Maybe feeling badly that this man is stepping into problems since you know how EW is?
"Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt"
Here's what I think...
First of all just me personally speaking, if my husband's ex wife got married, I'd be throwing a party. Seriously, I would be thrilled to death.
Here is what I think YOU are worried about...I think that you're worried that if this guy devastates her and the marriage crumbles, she'll suck right back up to YOUR husband, HE'll be having to pick up the pieces, and YOU'll be stuck right on the back burner and that'll piss you off. If I'm wrong, please feel free to tell me, but that is just my take.
Does that help???
Fearless
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who is Still Standing...
Rollin' with it since 2006...
I don't know,
I think the poor guy must be pretty dumb NOT to get to know this woman better especially taking into consideration all of the drama that surrounds her and her family. Yes, I do think that I feel badly for him because I know that she is going to marry him, take what she can, and then leave.
It also means yet another man involved in my step kid's lives, another man comming in and then leaving again.
The whole thing just makes me feel sick.
My husband can't stand her,
My husband would't take her back for all the money in the world. He would much rather pull each hair on his legs out one by one. That I do know!
Okay then let me think on this one...
Okay now that I have a little more info...
It also means yet another man involved in my step kid's lives, another man comming in and then leaving again.
The whole thing just makes me feel sick.
Okay I thought maybe your DH was one of these guys that worships at the altar of Holy St. Ex...okay...how I think you answered your own question; that you're worried about the compound effect it'll have on her kids and if her kids lives are disrupted, the ripple effect will then ripple right to you and upset your life?? I mean, really, who wants that???
Breathe, girl, it's all gonna be okay. Just remember, you can't control the situation...
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who is Still Standing...
Rollin' with it since 2006...
I agree with Fearless
You can't do anything about it. Just be the best SM you can be for your kids and be there for them if that in fact happens. Kids love stability. Let your relationship with DH be the rock in their lives.
"Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt"
Thank you.
I feel so much better! I appreciate both of your comments and will take a few minutes to just breathe and focus on my own family. Thank you so much.
I just LOVE this site! I
I just LOVE this site! I just read this post and the wonderful advise for Conflicted. It was just so timely...and gentle...and helpful.
This site is like a life-line consistently and patiently keeping us a float. Way to go!
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