My SD6.5 was over this weekend and told me on Sunday morning that her gums were 'big'. On closer inspection she had a 'blister' the circumference of a dime (maybe the size of a 2 raisins) on her lower gums beside the first molar next to the incisor. It freaked me and FH out!
So, we call BM and tell her about it. BM makes an appointment for this morning and low and behold my SD6.5 needs two root canals and 2 fillings for deep cavities. 4 rotting teeth in total!
BM only started allowing real toothpaste rather than the baby stuff (we've been using normal for 2 years now). Also, the kid eats sugar, sugar, sugar at BM's house. To the BM, ice cream is dairy, popsicles are juice and chocolate is fine anytime (you get the picture). Additionally, if the kid doesn't feel like brushing, she doesn't have to at BM's (BM has told us this!).
It's hard not to blame the BM, but I'd like to know if anyone else has experienced this. I understand kids like sweets and they don't like brushing their teeth, but SD never has any problems or objections here. I'd like to try to be objective if it's possible.
Thanks in advance!!!
Oh, my god -- that is
Oh, my god -- that is incredibly sad! This is a TERRIBLE way for your SD to have to start her dental history!
Sorry, I don't have any advice for you -- I just couldn't stop myself from commenting!
BB
You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. - 2BLoved
I don't think objectivity is
I don't think objectivity is the answer. I think you need to document this, save the paperwork from the doctor's office and photos of SD's teeth and talk to your attorney. Show them your documentation and see what they say.
Sounds like my BF's
Sounds like my BF's daughter. It was too stressful emotionally for BM to take her to the dentist and BF didn't...fluoride was poison, SD eats treats like nobody's business...well thefpoor thing had to have at least one pulpotomy, filling, and extractions...also has space retainers. It is ridiculous.
Same deal re brushing...no one really confirmed she brushed...and oh yeah, it was a demonstration of her independence that she refused the fluoride treatments the school gives the kids...
Did I mention neither BM or BF have dental insurance?
I think it is disgusting borderlining on neglect...
Wow poor kid!! The same
Wow poor kid!! The same thing happened with SD5. At age 4 she had two root canals done as well. BM still does not make them brush their teeth when they are there. I finally sat down with the girls and explained that it is their teeth so they need to make sure they brush them everyday. They just told me on Friday before BM picked them up that they do not have toothbrushes or toothpaste at their moms. So I went out in the snow and bought them each travel toothbrushes and toothpaste. I pack clothes for them to go to their moms EOW anyway (she doesn't have any winter clothes for them, a couple of months ago when she had them SD5 came home in a t-shirt with no jacket and it was 27 degrees outside). So I pack their clothes now and they have toothbrushes that stay with their stuff...
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How other people treat you is their karma - how you react to it yours.
I am sure she doesn't say no
I am sure she doesn't say no becuz she knows it is the routine. SD knows that if she says no BM will cave...normal kid stuff.
That many bad teeth is a serious problem--not just caused by bad brushing but also becuz she has inherited soft teeth. Becuz of this SD is going to have to take extra care than others to keep her teeth healthy. I hope the dentist explains this to BM.
She needs to get some ACT
She needs to get some ACT for kids and sd needs to use it everyday to make her enamel stronger. Does bm know that her daughter could die from an abscessed tooth?? Does she know that the bubble in her kids gum is called a fistula and holds bacteria that can travel into the blood??? Swelling from an abscessed tooth can migrate down the throat restricting the airway OR travel up to the eye and have potential to cause blindness...does bm realize not having a healthy mouth is not a thing she should screw with??? Sorry, people just piss me off. I see kids all the time getting their teeth pulled, coming in w their eyes swollen shut,etc...just bc they weren't made to take proper care of their mouth.
..."I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."
Hey BBB I think I finally
Hey BBB I think I finally found someone who acually does know EVERYTHING!
Will you be my bestfriend??? PRETTY PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE!
But I'm serious, If I could just pick your brain....
I don't know everything. but
I don't know everything. but thanks.
I'm in the dental profession and have been for 10 years. That's why I know something on this topic.
"Venting without the desire to look within and improve your situation is simply venting to hear yourself bitch."
..."I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."
Barbie...so would there be
Barbie...so would there be any other potential 'cause' to this besides poor hygiene and high sugar consumption? I realize that all of our teeth are different in composition, but with proper hygiene, low sugar diet, and regular visits to the dentist then there is no other explanation right?
BM and FH have joint custody, but we just found out today that during all other previous visits to the dentist, SD has been 'difficult' and has not 'allowed' a full check up or X-rays. BM never shared that info with FH. All he knew was that insurance claims for SD's dentist were going through his insurance, so he assumed that she was getting proper care.
Had he known that she was being difficult, he would have stepped in because she is an angel for everyone that is not her mother. Mom has no control over this kid and SD knows it.
Anyway, I was just wanting to make sure there was no other explanation for the state of her teeth!
***Life - It's not a rehearsal***
If she is difficult during a
If she is difficult during a cleaning or exam, there are dentists who perform sedation dentistry. I've seen children who are given an oral sedative to take the night before and the morning of their appointment then they are usually fine for xrays and cleanings.
There is no reason why SD should have this much tooth decay at her age. Bad genetics or not, if she is made to take proper care of her teeth, they should be healthy. Some kids DO need to brush 3 times a day rather than the standard 2times a day. Personally, I brush 3 times a day bc my teeth tend to get cavities in between for some reason and if I don't brush and floss after lunch, I'll get cavities. She might be the same way.
"Venting without the desire to look within and improve your situation is simply venting to hear yourself bitch."
..."I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."
I think this could be a
I think this could be a combination of bad genetics and poor dental hygiene.
My kids' teeth get brushed twice a day. I am VERY conscientious about that. My BD6 takes a pencil case with a toothbrush and toothpaste to school to brush her teeth after breakfast. The people who run the before-school care program think that is cute because she's about the ONLY one who brushes their teeth after eating.
But, when BD was 4 she had FOUR cavities. I was horrified. Like me, the valleys in her teeth are very deep and, like me, she just has an atmosphere in her mouth that lends itself to cavities. I have more cavities that I have teeth and just had my first crown at age 36, but my dentist will tell you that I do a GREAT job at brushing.
All that being said, I can't see it progressing to the stage you're at without really POOR hygiene.
We have the same issues with
We have the same issues with fsd's teeth. I don't get it...They need to learn to take care of their baby teeth - if they know how to take care of them they will have better habits in their future for taking care of their adult teeth.
Everyone in FH's family makes excuses for BM...they say, "Their just baby teeth - they'll fall out anyone!"
CRAZY!
Over my time being here I
Over my time being here I have noticed BBB is very knowledgeable in a very wide variety of things. Would a root canal be the best thing for a child that young. They barely have any permanent teeth at that age and a root canal is expensive. After they crown it, it would fall out in a few years anyways. Why not just have the tooth pulled. I only ask that because a dentist I took my child to said all these things and wanted to do all kind of stuff like veneers and inlays and something else. They made it out like those teeth were priority and that is what they would do first. It sounded weird so I went to another dentist and they told me that in a child those things would be ridiculous and they should have focused on just filling the 2 cavities. Root canals for a child just seem so extreme to me.
If the baby teeth are pulled
If the baby teeth are pulled before it is time for them to fall out it can cause the other teeth to drift into the empty space hindering the eruption of the adult teeth. If baby teeth have to be pulled at a young age then the kid would need something called a space retainer to avoid drifting of teeth and problems later on w the positioning of adult teeth.
This information is public on the ADA's website. Only reason I know it is bc I'm in the dental field, but you can have BM see for herself that baby teeth are important and shouldn't be neglected simply because, "they're going to fall out anyway"
http://www.ada.org/public/topics/baby.asp
..."I'm not mean, you're just a sissy."
My SD7 has never even been
My SD7 has never even been to a dentist. Not that DH and I haven't been pushing. DH even offered three times to take her with us when we get cleanings. BM is a crunchy hippie and prolly thinks the dentist is bad...
Sounds like the Girhippo and
Sounds like the Girhippo and SO's diet for the skids!! Nothing but junk, chocolate and sugar!! The Gir does take the skids to the dentists and doctors though; almost like a munchausen's by proxy. Of course EVERY time they go (like every 2 mos) they find more cavities!! Think the people that take their kid to an emergency room for a sniffle and you'll have the Girhippo pictured.
They don't brush their teeth. they just go to the dentist and run up the bill. No routine maintenance, just expensive after-the-fact doctor and dentist bills.
No WONDER why healthcare premiums are outrageous with all the Girhippos in the world.
**fine print disclaimer** this is not the children's fault of course but they do seem to recognize that daddy or mommy will obey them from an early age and take COMPLETE advantage of it as human nature dictates. This is COMPLETELY due to poor parenting.