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The new job and DH playing 'house husband'

I.hate.cats's picture

I am soooo glad to be back at work! I quit working a little over year ago at DH'S request (read: insistence). However the stress of BM, her insanity, lies and drama in addition to how it's effected SD6, just ended up being too much for him to handle. She'd text him non stop ALLL day long and as if that wasn't bad enough, BM'S on again off again boyfriend got involved and routinely called or texted DH to complain about BM. Inevitably it just messed DH up mentally and emotionally to the point that he couldn't deal and ended up losing his job.

During our meeting with the psychiatrist, he told DH that he should see me working as a good thing so I applied for a job that day, nailed the interview and started a week and a half ago. It's great to be able to have that time away from the bullshit of what's going on at home and having been a single mother to BS14 for so long, I don't mind having SD13 and SS14 on the roster as well, and for the most part, they're 10x more helpful than BS14. I put the majority of THE SD6 responsibility on DH.

He's back on this 'maybe we should try to work with BM' kick, despite her continued decline in behavior after being at BM's most of the time. On Friday her behavior note says she repeatedly stuck her tongue out at another child before threatening a second child with ' I'm going to punch you in the face". Her teacher sent home a conference note and I'm not sure if she intends to meet with BM and DH together, though she made it clear that I was invited as well. I responded with a little background on SD'S behavior and kindly stated that DH would attend the meeting either way but if she planned on a joint meeting I would have to decline as I didn't feel at that point my presence would be beneficial.

I guess I've moved into the detached state that I've read many of you ladies speak of. I'm kind to SD while she's here but have put anything having to do with SD back on DH and if it doesn't get done, then oh well. I feel bad that SD will suffer but when all is said and done, she's not my kid. As for SD13 and SS14, I mentioned to BM#1's husband that I would be happy to adopt them both if BM#2 wants to terminate her rights and he wants to stop paying child support. Both kids are very happy at the prospect and I couldn't love them anymore if I had given birth to them. The job is going well, DH FINALLY got my wedding ring repaired and I've come to terms with just sending SD to school in whatever belongs to BM but have decided to request switching our visitation day from Wednesday to Thursday so we have the opportunity to dress her nicely for school twice a month.

Basically, DH and I decided jointly that we can't keep this up, that fighting for SD is hurting our relationship, family and every other aspect of our lives.

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