Over compensating family members
Okay so my SO two kids are growing into self entitled little brats thanks to their grandfather on their mother side. Their grandfather gives them large amounts of money at one time not even telling their father what he's giving them. Maybe it's me but giving 13 & 14 yr olds over $300 in cash without their own parent knowing seems a bit strange. Shouldn't he be giving that to the parent instead? Anywho, now whenever Skids want something & daddy won't buy them it, they retort back to him "Well I don't care my grandfather will buy it for me anyways." Wow. We told their grandfather that he should consult with their father first before giving anything to the kids. He never listened. I think he's over compensating because his daughter (their lovely mother :sick: ) isn't doing anything for them. Don't know what else to do. It's making my SO miserable.
I figured as much. He said he
I figured as much. He said he didn't want to resort to limiting their visits to their grandfather's but it just may happen because he just don't know how to say no to them. He recently bought them expensive phones and their behavior is a mess! We told him that & he actually said "Well regardless of their behavior, a teenager still needs a phone." Really? I kinda thought it was a privilege not a necessity.
Grandfather may have bought
Grandfather may have bought the phone, but when it's at Dad's house, it's Dad's house - Dad's rules.
No reason that Dad can't restrict phone use on his time.
If Grandpa buys them something Dad doesn't approve, the item can be kept at Grandpa's for use there. When Grandpa starts seeing things gathering dust at his house he may reconsider how his money is being sent.
As to handing the kids hundreds of dollars, DH is just going to have to bite the bullet and talk to him.
If a parent doesn't know how
If a parent doesn't know how much cash a kid has on hand then they have no way of knowing what the kid is spending money on..... I would play the angle on grandpa of this-if they are buying drugs, we have no way to know since you aren't alerting us when you give them the money in the first place.
Your DH needs to get control of this asap bc 13 is a long way until 18.
I've asked him why he didn't
I've asked him why he didn't consider asking or going into the CS route and he said that he didn't want to do that. He said that that would create more problems. I don't get it really. Thr grandfather doesn't even visit. The kids goes to his house and he gives them whatever they ask for and want. Other than that, we hardly hear from him.