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What to do with stepdaughter's room when she goes off to college?

wickedevil's picture

My step-daughter will be 18 in January, and will be heading off to college next year. She lives with her mom and visits our house a couple times a month. (The house was my husband’s before we started dating). At the most, she sleeps in her room 4 times per month. Our house is basically where she comes when she has nothing better to do, like a typical teenager. I have talked to my husband about my desire to change her room into a guest room when she goes off to college, and adding a craft/wrapping center so that my craft stuff and the gift wrap stuff is easily accessible. As it is now, all of that stuff it stuck in random spots, not easily accessible, and often I end up purchasing items that I already have because I don’t know where it is. So, I mentioned last night that I would like to get one of those wall beds that fold up so that there isn’t a bed in the room, taking up space, at all times. It can be unfolded on the occasion we have a guest, or stepdaughter stays once she’s in college. He told me that he was waiting for at least two years after she is in college before he changes that room around. I think it’s ludicrous to keep a room for an adult who is NEVER going to be in it. I mean, she’s only at our house a few times a month as it is now. I really, really don’t see her staying here when she visits from college, when there are little to no rules at her mother’s house, she will be seeing her friends and her boyfriend on visits, and she will have her room at her mother’s house (which is only about 7 minutes from ours). Am I being unreasonable for wanting to change the room into something that can be used for more than her potential couple times a year visits? I think it’s a waste of space to not put that room to use. His mother visits twice a year, one month in the winter and usually about three months in the spring. It would be a nice place for her to stay. She does stay in there now unless his daughter happens to spend the night when his mother is visiting. When his daughter is visiting his mother sleeps on the pull out sofa and his daughter sleeps in his bed. You know, don’t dare make the teenager sleep on the pullout so the elderly lady can sleep in comfort, once in a while. But, that’s her father’s and her grandmother’s doing because they don’t want to “put her out”. We only have three bedrooms as it is, because one of the rooms is used as my husband’s office. He and I have one, my daughter has one and my step-daughter has the other. I can’t help but think if he wanted to use that room for something he would be jumping all over it. I could be wrong though, because he’s always been a Disney Dad.

hereiam's picture

Give it a few months and see how often she actually comes and spends the night. Two years is a little much, in my opinion; it would be different if she lived there full time to begin with.

wickedevil's picture

That's what I was thinking too. If she lived with us full time it would be a different story, although I still feel two years would be too much...maybe just one to make sure college sticks.

somedevilishbeauty's picture

Start putting all your craft and wrapping stuff in his office until it starts bothering him, then maybe he will reconsider }:)

Rags's picture

Make it the guest room now. No need to dedicate a room to a transient/intermittent/short resident member of the blended family regardless of the age of the person. When she is in the home she can use the room. When she is not there it can be used by guests of for anything else you feel like using for. Crafts, reading, office, study, etc....