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Paying childcare for a kid over 13?

asheeha's picture
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I live in OKlahoma. My husband is paying for daycare costs to his ex wife. She claims she pays her mom $120 for this per week. I can rant up a storm the bs this is but it's a battle long gone. However my oldest step daughter is 13 and we are still paying childcare costs for her. There is no age out option on the divorce decree. So, we will be paying childcare until she's 18 or going back to court for another $10,000 in court costs and lawyer fees? Seems like there should be an easier way. Thanks for your help

thinkthrice's picture

The olde "I'm paying my mom for childcare" routine. Ah yes, the girhippo would make up phoney receipts supposedly showing daycare expenses that her mother was charging. Or a good friend she would barter with to show family court and CSEU.

Of course the GUBM court bought it hook, line and sinker. I told Chef that he should demand the skids be at a regular daycare center or a licensed home daycare person and not just with the BM's friends and relatives (who could continue the PAS campaign).

This site shows that subsidized daycare ends by the 13th birthday:

http://www.okdhs.org/programsandservices/cc/asst/docs/faq.htm#2

I would take a cue from that site. I live in New York and as soon as my daughter was 12, she became the de facto after school care for my younger son out of sheer necessity.

IMHO A 13 year old *should* be mature enough to do a short babysitting stint for OTHERS not have to have daycare for the 13 year old!!!

But then again that was a day and age of yore when children had expectations and actually were trained by their parental units on proper manners, maturity and conduct as they grew older.

asheeha's picture

Thanks thinkthrice!

I had seen the Dhs limitation for childcare. But apparently they don't take that into consideration for divorcee's and ex's who are bleeding every drop they can think of. It's maddening. For the 11 and 13 year olds BM claims to spend $2500 each per year on daycare. However the 4 year old (who has a different dad she's no longer with) pays only $425 per year! I could go on and on about the bs the she feeds the court and they just eat it up.

asheeha's picture

That makes a whole lot more sense. But in Oklahoma the lawyers encourage grandparents to claim they charge as much as a licensed daycare. It's the norm here.

Rags's picture

Most states end child care subsidy by the NCP at 12. At least that is what Sperm Land courts followed. Usually child care does not end automatically. The NCP must motion the court to drop it when the child reaches appropriate age. No need to get lawyers involved. Just go pro-se and petition the court or DA to drop the child care element of the CO.

The Sperm Idiot paid an extra $50/mo for his share of child care for the last 7 years of the CO though he only actually owed it until the Skid turned 12. The CO said when he turned 12 either party had to petition the court to end the child care element of CS. We damned sure were not going to do it and he never did. So, we got an extra $600/yr for the last 6 years of the CO. I considered it poetic Karmic justice for the idiot in the black robe give the Sperm Idiot a $1000/mo income reduction allowance for CS calculation purposes due to "Step dad's significant income" The reduction in his possible CS level was only $50/mo due to the $1000/mo income reduction so he just gave us that money back by not ever requesting an end to the child care element of CS. }:) Blum 3 Dirol

Give it a try.

asheeha's picture

Thanks rags! I will. I have a call into the lawyer but who knows if she'll ever call me back.

just.his.wife's picture

You can always demand a receipt and explain your claiming it ad an expense on your taxes. See then the irs gets interested..

Polarbear's picture

I am a licensed daycare but in CA. I have had kids over 13 but for school transportation reasons and health issues. But the others are right about the income. The grandparents or friends would still have to report income on their tax returns...if he is actually paying them. Hold them accountable for evidence.

skidsrule's picture

Is your DH complaining? my first instinct was that its the grandma. if my mom or exes mom were willing to come care for my child I'd pay her gladly! just the bonding is important. and I'd certainly take that over $10k in attorney fees.

if it causes a hardship you might discuss with bm or file pro per for minimal expense.